Karma for the Soul

When needs are not met..

2011-12-24T23:15:00.000+08:00

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You start out having perspectives, preferences, opinions, desires and attitudes that you feel reflect you as a person and then once you find yourself in a relationship, be it with a lover or a friend you slowly but surely start sacrificing these for new perspectives, preferences, opinions, desires, and attitudes that more reflect those of the person you are in relationship with. Meanwhile you start to feel as if you and your life are slowly dissolving away. You start to feel perhaps uncertain as to who you really are and what you stand for. You perhaps find yourself feeling like a passive participant in a life that does not truly reflect your deepest innermost desires. You start to feel a deep sense of emptiness and a great deal of self doubt. You sense a growing sense of sadness and possibly even the specter of depression. Perhaps this leads also to feelings of anger towards the other as well as yourself. Perhaps you find yourself unconsciously sabotaging yourself in ways that lead to the demise of the relationship and there after feeling badly about what happened and about yourself.

What is at the root of such a pattern?

There may be many things such as:

1. The need to please others in order to feel loved appreciated or validated.
2. The fear that asserting one's true self might lead to being rejected.
3. The fear of being criticized by the other.
4. The need to avoid feeling guilt at any cost.
5. Feelings that you don't deserve a right to your own opinions, desires, preferences etc.

These items and many others like them are similar to the programming one finds in your computer. They literally have programmed you to feel and behave in ways that severely constrict you and your ability to manifest your life in the ways that feel right and true for you. The result is that you "do not" manifest what you desire and that is akin to "not living"!

Living in such a "straight jacket" however is not what is desired by anyone or by the Life Force that lives inside you. Hence it is natural for one who is programmed in such a way to feel a deep sense of frustration about their situation. Indeed this frustration is a normal and healthy response to the constrictions one is experiencing. It along with the desire to feel and be free and expansive are the driving forces that lead one to seeking a way to freedom.

"dear god, would i ever see the light of such day - to feel even a fleeting moment of freedom.."

No person can give you your identity, but they can assist you in losing it if allowed..

2011-12-24T23:03:00.000+08:00

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Sometimes you meet people who inspire you to change. Change is good, right? Nothing is static in life. As a person grows, she changes. What happens when those people you meet, impact you so, that you no longer recognize yourself.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you begin to behave like the people around you?

If you've been around enough older ladies, you've heard this phrase a time or two: Be mindful of the company that you keep. That company includes friends, family, acquaintances and romantic partners.

Scenario 1:
Normally you're a very positive and uplifting person. You pride yourself on not gossiping about people or negatively critiquing them. You're with a group of friends in a social setting. You all eye another lady who is not quite put together, so the critiques begin. Do you join in? One friend says, "Now she knows she is wrong for wearing that!" Another, "Did she really think she was cute coming in here with that on?" What do you say or do? Do you join in tearing another woman down? Or do you call attention to the fact that even you with your fly self, have fallen off a time or two?
If this occurs on a regular basis, you may have found yourself joining in, more often than you care to admit. It is possible that you have even let your claws come out before your friends whisper a word. Have you began to allow others to pull your identity away? Are you becoming that catty person?

Scenario 2:
You're an independent man, who doesn't answer to anyone or allow yourself to be controlled. So you've been dating your special someone for quite some time. In the beginning she liked everything about you. There may have been a little suggestion here or there about your weight or the clothes you chose to wear. No big deal, right? She's just offering constructive criticism. Then the critiques become more frequent. So now you just let her pick out your clothes, and you go on a diet.
Nothing wrong with a woman caring about her man.
Have you lost charge of your life for the sake of "love"? Do you allow your self assurance to be replaced by insecurities and apprehension?

Scenario 3:
You've always been the person guided by integrity and principles. At work, you see people ascend the ladder of success with ease, while you are stuck in the same position. You have noticed that those people spend time skirting by, doing half the work you do. Most of their time is spent stepping on whomever gets in their way and playing "the game" no matter how many lies they have to tell or ways they have to cheat.
Your boss approaches you with an opportunity for you to get in on the game. You may have to tell a couple of lies or fudge a few numbers to do so. You've watched the best get ahead this same way, so why not? You want this so badly that doing this once won't hurt anything. So you go for it, just that one time.
Do you lend yourself to the ways of those who forge ahead at all costs, no matter the collateral damage? Or do you stay true to your integrity and principles, holding fast to your hard work some day paying off?

Unfortunately negative influences are readily available to you every day.
When you know and love who you are, you should choose to surround yourself with people who support and accept you. If there are things about you that you find necessary to change, let those changes be positive ones. You can always find new friends, but you will never find another you. The relationships you choose can influence you beyond your imagination. Do not lose yourself in other people.

losing your identity..

2011-12-24T22:53:00.000+08:00

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When people talk and think about the word 'potential', all too often they refer to one's unique capabilities, talents and strengths. I believe this offers a limited perspective, because true potential can only be fostered at the level of identity, your own special way of being in this world.

It is your identity, or your perception or concept of who you think you are, that directs and organizes your beliefs, core values, capabilities, actions and behaviors. It is at the level of your authentic self that you will find the source of all your resources!

There are more billion people in the world, yet no one is just like you! Do anyone actually care about that?

The acknowledgment that each of us is truly unique leads to an innate desire to express that uniqueness, which unleashes a person's natural sense of creativity and passion.

Montana Gray said it very well when he wrote that if you live your authentic life, you have no competition.

Throughout life's experiences, the way you are is expressed through the different roles you have chosen to take on. Roles such as being a mother or a father, a brother or a sister, a business professional, a community leader, a CEO, a husband or wife, a construction worker, a friend, and so on.

Think for a moment about the different roles you have chosen to take on. Each role invites you, or calls upon you, to express your authentic self. Each roles carries within a mission to be fulfilled.

If you are a mother, are you fully being a mother? If you are a CEO or a business executive, how committed are you to fully being yourself within that role?

Personal congruence and integrity are the source of defining your personal boundaries.

Somehow one feel as if they have lost their true identity.
What does that mean?

They feel that they can no longer express themselves fully and authentically within a certain role. Some continue to stay in roles, trying to live up to the expectations of others. Just like the medical doctor who came to the realization that she would prefer to teach children, rather than being a doctor. When I asked what made her committed to study medicine for more than 15 years, she paused for a moment and said, “Well, I think my father would have been proud of me.”

Take a moment and reflect on all the different roles you have chosen to take on in your life. How do they define you? Which roles invite you to express more of who you really are? Which roles are no longer supporting you?

I believe that we choose and accept to take on different roles for well intended reasons. Yet some of these reasons might be outdated and no longer serve you in becoming the person you were meant to be.

Taking personal responsibility for expressing who you really are is a privilege and tremendous freedom.

Who are you?

If not yourself, who else can you be? And if you want to be like someone else, who would be you?
Once you acknowledge and accept the different roles you have taken on, you can take full responsibility for your life and become more of the person you really want to be.

In return, you can be seen, known, and understood for who you truly are. And isn't that the most profound connection we can hope for? Give yourself permission to be more of who you really are!

Be who you are; say what you want to say.. Those that matters to you, don't mind... really?

2011-12-22T22:00:00.000+08:00

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What is define as need? Or at least emotional need?

"...As soon as I realized that a large Love Bank balance triggered the feeling of love, I went to work trying to discover what spouses could do for each other that would make the largest Love Bank deposits. I would ask couples, "What could your spouse do for you that would make you the happiest?" That very question focused on a core issue in marriage -- the issue of care. I could have asked the question, "How would you like your spouse to care for you?" As it turns out, care in marriage is doing what it takes to make each other happy.

When you were married, you and your spouse both promised to care for each other, and you expected that care from each other. You were in love, and you were highly motivated to make each other happy. But it might not have occurred to you at the time that if you didn't care for each other the right way, you might lose your love for each other. And along with your loss of love, you might lose your willingness to care for each other.

At the time, you probably did not know what caring for each other the right way meant. You thought that your commitment to care for each other would be sufficient to sustain your love. Even today, you may still be in the dark as to what it takes to care for each other the right way.

If that's the case, let me explain to you what care in marriage is: To care the right way, you must make large Love Bank deposits. And I've found that the best way to make those deposits is to meet each other's most important emotional needs.

What is an emotional need? It is a craving that, when satisfied, leaves you with a feeling of happiness and contentment, and, when unsatisfied, leaves you with a feeling of unhappiness and frustration. There are probably thousands of emotional needs. A need for birthday parties, peanut butter sandwiches, Monday Night Football, I could go on and on. Some people have some of those needs while others have different needs. If you feel good doing something, or if someone does something for you that makes you feel good, an emotional need has been met.

But not all emotional needs are created equally. When some are met, you may only feel comfortable--they make small Love Bank deposits. There are others, however, that can make you feel downright euphoric. In fact they make you so happy that you're likely to fall in love with the person that meets them. I call those our most important emotional needs because they make the largest Love Bank deposits of all. And those are the very same emotional needs that a husband and wife expect each other to meet in marriage.

When I first began using this approach to saving marriages, I didn't know what made people the happiest in marriage -- I didn't know what emotional needs would be the most important. So I had to ask hundreds of men and women that question, "What could your spouse do for you that would make you the happiest?"

As spouses explained what they wanted most, I classified their desires into emotional need categories. And almost all those I interviewed described one or more of only ten emotional needs as being most important to them (admiration, affection, conversation, domestic support, family commitment, financial support, honesty and openness, physical attractiveness, recreational companionship and sexual fulfillment). Very few ever named a most important emotional need that was not included in this list of ten.

I also made a revolutionary discovery that helped me understand why husbands and wives tended not to meet each other's most important emotional needs. Whenever I asked couples to list their needs according to what they needed most, men would list them one way and women the opposite way. Of the 10 emotional needs, the five listed as most important by men were usually the five least important for women, and vice-versa.

What an insight! It is no wonder that husbands and wives have so much difficulty meeting each other's needs: They lack empathy. They are willing to do for each other what they appreciate the most, but it turns out that their efforts are misdirected. What they appreciate the most, their spouses appreciate the least! .."

So what happens when that needs are not met? Suppression?? Maybe.. Depression.. Likely too.. As now, mine will be as sacred as a pandora box.. not to be seen, heard, discuss, open..

In pain..

2011-11-21T00:44:00.000+08:00

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I'm in the state where I can't find the peace that I've longed for.. Found myself today at lost.. wanting so bad to run away.. Somehow something pulled me back - The voice of reason I forgot I had..

All I know is you're not here to say what you always used to say.. That you have move on, accepting my flaws and creatures habits of mine with no judgements on me..

Yes, I won't give up and I won't break down.. Even if the whole world expect that of me.. but I will be different.. the route to change may not be pleasantries and all..

So if it all goes wrong; when I'm standing in the dark, I'll give up believing someone's watching over me..

All I know is yesterday is gone and right now I belong to this moment to my pain, rage and sorrows.. It's not the new scars that are painful or unbearable.. its the scars that strikes across the old that have yet to start to heal..

It used to be "It doesn't matter what people say and it doesn't matter how long it take, believe in yourself and you'll fly high and it only matters how true you are be true to yourself and follow your heart..." I thought I did all that.. To give everything I could but time and time, it trick me again.. placing me in ever state of confusion.. It is so easy for one to spot the mistakes I did and harp on it.. I know that I'm not gifted in accepting my flaws simply because I detest it myself.. It seems too much for people to accept much less understand.. Understanding is unconditional.. It does not mean you have to impose your opinions and views..

Can love conquer it all? Can I ever placed my state of fragile in the hands of trust? Should I even think of that possibilities? For now.. the answers will always be a blur..

Beaten; bashed; humiliated..

2011-10-31T21:07:00.001+08:00

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This would be by far the darkest entry I would find myself the courage to pen it down.. At many point of this month, I had wished I would die and you know - just let the world be.. I know I was different or strange to a fault but the age old question of "what's wrong with that?" seems to hit me harder and harder.. It wasn't just ".. it's okay to be who you are.." that had eluded me on the sly, but the mere question of my purpose in this world and in this life made me wonder - was I a mistake to be born on this earth? Am I such a loathe that my thinking which is not the traditional cookie mould method; gets in every step of people's way? What's wrong with having character?

I do not expect you to understand every bit of me; never do I expect you to succumb to my needs or wants.. All I ask is to be treated with the same level of respect that I would put aside for you in the first place; without judging; without prejudice and in all fairness.. A difficult feat for mere mortals!

I'm tired - really.. Of facing against the norm that tried so hard to drown me in their "wisdoms", opinions, feedbacks etc.. I've been swimming in the rage for far too long.. I should have thought of just letting myself be drown and be spared from the incessant pain, turmoils and despair.. I should have drop my ideals and let go of any hopes and dreams.. The world is no longer a safe haven - it never was, it wasn't meant to be..

What I had now is disgust, shame, deluded, anger, revenge, hatred.. But above all, the compassion is still strong.. A stupid fool I have been.. Always subject himself to be different yet at the same time, don't have the hardened heart to disappoint the others.. It seems the way I lived my life is based on people's expectations.. Forget about affirmation which by far and wide, it is not the world's or anybody strength but of all, listen.. You have a goddamn pair of ears whose primary function is to listen but god knows what you did with that gift.. Maybe I have a part to play but I pride myself to at least register the other party views first for I practised what matters to me.. But that action is simply pushed aside!

In my mind, thoughts run amok and dangeously changed me.. What gave you the right to undermined me; to say that you or yours are better? or that I'm stubborn with my ideals and principles/ values? The very least I know what motivated me and who matters.. I would have kill you at the slightest chance if my heart was that of an assassin... I would have blast your head off beyond recognition if I got gifts of a mutant.. I would have placed a deadly curse that spans beyond your descendants if I had the calibre of a witch/ warlord!

It is without doubt that my heart survives all this silence and emotional battles through sheer miracles or rather plainly put; when I'm alone and shutting myself off from all this wordly affairs.. I've care too much that it begin to eat into my faith and destroying it.. I've misplaced my trust again.. I've shed enough tears that are not worthy of anybody.. I have enough of people who claimed they are standing by me and support me for who I am..

Bullshit! A whole lot of crap!.. Are you without sin? What gave you the rights to give feedback in the pretence of being my friend?! What makes you think that feedbacks are damned welcome and serve a greater purpose? Please, take it I'm pleading.. Look into the mirror yourself.. The very reason why I am careful with my feedbacks or observations was because humanity is beautiful in the various state of imperfections. Yes, we can strive to improve on our blindspots in hope that we can make our life better or that we can wield positive influences around.. And if we don't? Should we octracised them?

It is not as though a question of morality which by the way were decided by blokes of eons ago who may not even have the sufficient knowledge or understanding why certain things are wrong in the first place... I care too much.. I have hope too high.. It's time for me to revert to my selish self.. The person that have successfully block me from all pains and destructive emotions.. Who in my opinion never left me all alone by my side, who is there to nurse me and support me unconditionally.. He will care for me the much needed remedy/ medicine/ treatment that I need now.. more than ever..

On top of all this, I have make a pledge.. a first in my life.. To let selfish in my life longer and let it consumed me as it should.. Happiness can parked itself in the sorry slot..

I wish I had died...

2011-10-14T19:07:00.000+08:00

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Let me tell you a true story.

A middle-aged man was standing in one of my examination rooms early one morning. He was smiling broadly, which was something of a miracle as I had never known this man to smile. He looked happy, which seemed even more miraculous. Stranger still, he made me feel at peace, when just moments earlier I had felt harried and stressed.
The miracle was not in his smile, his happiness, or in how he made me feel. The miracle was that just a few days earlier he was dead.
Alex was a professional man whose schedule and responsibilities mirrored his success. For many weeks he had been experiencing strange sensations in his chest. It wasn't pain, so it did not concern him. Convinced that the sensations were from gastric reflux, he carried a roll of antacids with him wherever he went.
One morning, Alex felt the now familiar sensation while sitting in a meeting. It was no different than the hundreds, perhaps thousands, of episodes that had come before, but this time, he got up from his meeting and drove himself across town to the hospital. Standing before the registration clerk of the emergency room, Alex pointed to his chest and told her that he thought something was wrong with his heart. In that instant, he collapsed across her desk, and died.
His smile took the chill from the coolness of the examination room. I tingled with excitement, wondering what mysteries he could speak of. He turned to me and said, "Dying was the best thing that ever happened to me."

I wish it was me instead...

There are moments in life powerful enough to change us instantly and forever. Far too often, though, these special moments come when we are not present to notice, lost in the dramas of yesterday or our plans for tomorrow. Perhaps wisdom is living the richness that each day offers, being present to recognize those moments with the power to transform us, and seizing them before they can slip away into the currents of time. ..

The missing one...

2011-08-30T21:27:00.000+08:00

Maybe I didn't love you quite as often as I could have
And maybe I didn't treat you quite as good as I should have
If I made you feel second best girl I'm sorry I was blind
You were always on my mind you were always on my mind

And maybe I didn't hold you all those lonely lonely times
I guess I never told you I'm so happy that you're mine
Little things I should have said and done I just never took the time
But you were always on my mind you were always on my mind

Tell me tell me that your sweet love hasn't died
And give me give me one more chance to keep you satisfied i'll keep you satisfied
Little things I should have said and done..I JUST NEVER CUT THE TIME.
You were always on my mind you were always on my mind

Step Toward Personal Change...

2011-08-27T18:10:00.000+08:00

Interesting facts:

How is life defined? Is it the process of breathing? Or, is it the state of consciousness?
It has to be both of those things. However, if today was our last day on earth and we were asked to describe our lives in retrospect, would we define it as such.

We would probably reference our lives from a collection of memories. Therefore, even more so than the act of breathing or consciousness, our lives are defined by thoughts, perceptions, and recollections of our experiences.

The goal of personal development is to develop our potential. Ultimately, it is an endeavor to enhance the overall quality of our lives. Therefore, if the story of our lives is comprised of recollected experiences, then the most direct way to improve our lives is to improve our experiences.

Improvement requires change, and change requires work. But with a change of such magnitude, we are challenged with knowing where to start.

Tabula Rasa
Tabula Rasa is a theory that embraces the idea that knowledge comes from experience and perception. Tabula Rasa translates as “blank slate,” and refers to the practice of writing on a slate sheet with chalk. So, as the theory goes, we start out with a blank slate and as we experience life, the slate becomes filled.

For personal change, the most important tool we can have will not be found in an expensive set of books or videos. In fact, it won’t actually cost anything. This important tool is the tabula rasa.

In other words, the first step toward change is to mentally give ourselves a blank slate.

Why?
It is difficult to rewrite our lives with a mind filled with clutter from the past. Imagine trying to add water to a cup that is already full. Therefore, envisioning a blank slate accomplishes 3 important things:

It mentally represents a fresh start.
It limits our focus to the present.
It compels us to mindfully design our lives.

The Necessary Backdrop

A blank slate provides the necessary backdrop on which to layer other personal development techniques. Freeing ourselves from mental clutter creates a cleared space for new perspectives.

A blank slate is not only a design instrument; it also records our experiences, which ultimately become the threads of our recollections. Therefore, it can spark an internal enthusiasm to fill the slate with truly enriching experiences. Without mindless clutter from the past, we have an opportunity to move forward mindfully and intentionally – which, in itself, is very empowering.

Creating a New Landscape
The purpose of personal development is to enhance the experience of living. Ultimately, the goal is to be able to look back at any given time and see a rich landscape, artfully layered with the colors of enriching experiences.

The good news is that it is an endeavor that can be started today. Then, like a painter, we can add the colors we wish, one by one, to design a more meaningful life.

But it all starts with an empty canvas – a blank slate – the tabula rasa.

A father's message from beyond...

2011-08-01T23:02:00.000+08:00

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A FATHER'S RULES FOR FINDING FULFILLMENT

Be courteous, be punctual, always say please and thank you, and be sure to hold your knife and fork properly. Others take their cue on how to treat you from your manners.

Be kind, considerate and compassionate when others are in trouble, even if you have problems of your own. Others will admire your selflessness and will help you in due course.

Show moral courage. Do what is right, even if that makes you unpopular. I always thought it important to be able to look at myself in the shaving mirror every morning and not feel guilt or remorse. I depart this world with a pretty clear conscience.

Show humility. Stand your ground but pause to reflect on what the other side are saying, and back off when you know you are wrong. Never worry about losing face. That only happens when you are pig-headed.

Learn from your mistakes. You will make plenty so use them as a learning tool. If you keep making the same mistake or run into a problem, you’re doing something wrong.

Avoid disparaging someone to a third party; it is only you who will look bad. If you have a problem with someone, tell them face to face.

Hold fire! If someone crosses you, don’t react immediately. Once you say something it can never be taken back, and most people deserve a second chance.

Have fun. If this involves taking risks, so be it. If you get caught, hold your hands up.

Give to charity and help those who are less fortunate than yourselves: it’s easy and so rewarding.

Always look on the upside! The glass is half full, never half empty. Every adversity has a silver lining if you seek it out.

Make it your instinct always to say ‘yes’. Look for reasons to do something, not reasons to say no. Your friends will cherish you for that.

Be canny: you will get more of what you want if you can give someone more of what they desire. Compromise can be king.

Always accept a party invitation. You may not want to go, but they want you there. Show them courtesy and respect.

Never ever let a friend down. I would bury bodies for my friends, if they asked me to . . . which is why I have chosen them carefully.

Always tip for good service. It shows respect. But never reward poor service. Poor service is insulting.

Always treat those you meet as your social equal, whether they are above or below your station in life. For those above you, show due deference, but don’t be a sycophant.

Always respect age, as age equals wisdom.

Be prepared to put the interests of your sibling first.

Be proud of who you are and where you come from, but open your mind to other cultures and languages. When you begin to travel (as I hope you will), you’ll learn that your place in the world is both vital and insignificant. Don’t get too big for your breeches.

Be ambitious, but not nakedly so. Be prepared to back your assertions with craftsmanship and hard work.

Live every day to its full: do something that makes you smile or laugh, and avoid procrastination.

Give of your best at school. Some teachers forget that pupils need incentives. So if your teacher doesn’t give you one, devise your own.

Always pay the most you can afford. Never skimp on hotels, clothing, shoes, make-up or jewellery. But always look for a deal. You get what you pay for.

Never give up! My two little soldiers have no dad, but you are brave, big-hearted, fit and strong. You are also loved by an immensely kind and supportive team of family and friends. You make your own good fortune, my children, so battle on.

Never feel sorry for yourself, or at least don’t do it for long. Crying doesn’t make things better.

Look after your body and it will look after you.

Learn a language, or at least try. Never engage a person abroad in conversation without first greeting them in their own language; by all means ask if they speak English!

And finally, cherish your mother, and take very good care of her.

I love you both with all my heart.

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”

2011-06-03T20:22:00.000+08:00

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No, it isn’t some trick and no it isn’t some life changing product. Its something that we all are capable of doing but often choose not to do or choose to hold on to until it begins to consume us.

What is it?

Forgiveness.

It sounds so plain. So plain and overstated.

I recently found an undelivered letter I had written many, many years ago. Within that letter, there was pain, anger and definitely no forgiveness throughout. It was two months after our break up and I still could not let go of the anger I felt. I held on to the anger for months. I had almost completely moved on from what had happened between the both of us but I still could not fully gain control of a small part of me that was not willing to actually forgive. I told myself I can forgive and carried on but I truly had not.

Years later I found myself occasionally thinking back, not of the fond memories but of the moment when I chose to be angry and chose to react with that anger. I started to question if I had forgiven and I realized that I hadn’t and that a not so feel good moment had actually managed to latch on to me for this long. I didn’t want to live my life that way. I had moved on in all other aspects of my life and was actually grateful for the fact that I did not stay in that relationship for longer. I told myself I needed to forgive myself first of all.
Forgiveness is an interesting feeling and action. When we choose not to forgive we are not only not forgiving the other person but we are not forgiving ourselves for feeling the things we feel and in return we are not validating what we feel. In a way we are telling ourselves that we must still feel angry about the past, we are telling ourselves that we still need to hurt for the past, in a sense we are telling ourselves that if we forgive we are no longer holding that person to the wrong that they did. By doing this we continue to treat ourselves like victims and the longer we stay victims the longer it will take us to realize our greatness.

When we finally choose to forgive ourselves for holding on to the past we make a conscious decision to no longer treat ourselves as victims, we stop associating ourselves with the old us that once was; this is empowering. After you realize this within yourself, forgiving the other person is no longer a decision you have to make, it is already made. That person no longer holds anything on you. You will free yourself of the pain and the anger.

So you must make a conscious decision to forgive yourself first. Letting go isn’t the hard part, it is telling yourself that you no longer have to be a victim to your past.

Courage is the compliment of fears

2011-06-03T20:18:00.000+08:00

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... I like this.. so true to me..

We usually feel fear when we get frustrated, when our self-esteem is threatened, or when we feel pressured to perform beyond our perceived capability. Unhealthy fear is debilitating; healthy fear is mobilizing. But no matter what kind of fear you experience, it requires your immediate attention, or you risk cowering behind your full potential for the rest of your life.

Fighting fear is futile

Acknowledge that it’s there, and move on: How can I make singing this song an enjoyable experience? Now your mind has something else to focus on!

Don’t fight it, instead face it, but like an ex-lover, it is something you can definitely let go of. Like a ghost in your past, tell it that you don’t have to be afraid of the things you were afraid of in the past or as a child anymore.

Reality vs. Fantasy

Learn to differentiate obvious, realistic threats from unrealistic fears that you may just be magnifying or catastrophizing.

Fear is a normal emotion and its purpose is to protect us from threats and dangers in our environment, like naturally backing off when we are near the edge of a cliff. This is real and you must act on it for your safety’s sake.

But more often than not, our perceived threats are very far from our immediate circumstance, and our most imagined fears don’t come true at all in real life.

Letting our imagined fears rule our lives cause us to miss out on great opportunities, hamper how we carry out our responsibilities, and cause us to dismiss people and situations that could otherwise make our lives richer and more fulfilling.

Measure your fear in inches

Play out your most realistic fears and imagine the worst-case scenario. What are the odds of it happening and what can you do to prepare yourself for it in case it happens?

If this fear comes true, would its effects be permanent or temporary? Is it normal and inevitable such as natural death or growing old, or far-fetched like being abducted by aliens? On a scale of 1 to 10, how bad are the consequences of this fear?

Gathering objective data about your fear can help put it in its proper perspective in your life rather than let it remain some mystical terror which you magnify and shudder unreasonably from, which leads you to the next tip…

Take action

The best way thing to do in facing up to your fears is doing something concrete about it. While you can’t eliminate the root cause of every fear you have, doing something about what’s within your power will make you realize that you’re not completely powerless to just succumb to it either.

Things like having a fire extinguisher in your house, taking good care of your health, parking in well-lit areas and locking your car, preparing well for a performance or speech, or starting out small if you’re shy or afraid to swim, taking up hypnosis or relaxation classes, you get the idea. Doing something can spell the difference between conquering your fears or letting it conquer you.

Knowledge is power

Often the reason we fear is because we are afraid of the unknown. When you’re dealing with what you don’t know, potential consequences seem far worse than they actually are. Take the power out of your fear by understanding it.

Map out all the potential outcomes, both good and bad, to get a genuine understanding of the risk of it happening and the benefits if it’s prevented. Analyzing these outcomes will help you see clearer through your fear and empower you to manage it better, like recovering from surgery or living with cancer, for example.

Faith is good for you

Last but not the least, people who trust in a Being or natural order higher than themselves in things they have no control over are scientifically proven to be healthier, less stressed, and have more peace of mind than those who have no one or nothing but themselves to rely on.

Whether it is trust in a supreme being, karma, or the universe, fear is lessened in the expectation that things will always work out for the greater good in the end.

This is not the same as blindly throwing your fears to fate. On the other hand, faith acknowledges that fear is very real, but trusting that someone bigger is still in control when you aren’t anymore will definitely make it easier for you face your fear and eventually let go of it.

Learn, un-learn, re-learn...

2011-04-30T14:51:00.000+08:00

Featured URL www.elections.gov.sg

General elections.. What do I really feel about it? Honestly, I realised I detached myself relatively a lot. Not because I'm not interested or than I don't care for my future generations but seriously, the government and the people will have to clap hands together. I take what I have and give back by standing up on my own.

I personally do not favour government that "pamper" us and bring us to our feet through exhausting previous resources. I mean, for all our glorified past historical setbacks, we have improved from a third World country to that of an equivalent first World. All this without the government pampering us.

Yes! The cost of living is higher, housing is getting more expensive, ERP rates and transport fees are getting higher on top of lack of service but which country are spare from that? And which country actually can say they have the perfect system in handling such perceived poverty. Current government may have made some unpopular choices that happens to touch the raw nerves of many, surely we can't overlook the other merits. Foundations that they have painstakingly built has already etched deeply and rooted itself. Unless someone that is taking over strategies to improve the system by NOT (read) removing nor destroying, I believe it would be a better move.

Common oppositions, with all those flowery motivations and intense prep talk, you could have walk the talk and anchored that. You shared with how you like to stop raising prices of this and that, digging into resources to curb our "pain", demolishing current policies, reducing foreigners and putting in place another source of revenue - end state, one question. What is your backup plans when such promises fail? I believe in all truest you can deliver and you CAN, but at what cause. Would taking less foreigners in makes Singaporeans take back the slack that they left ie construction coolies, cleaners, maids etc?

Would removing the so-called expensive-but-not-bringing-in-the-bucks manufacturing sector and replacing it with service sector bring in revenue quickly? And tab on what? Casinos? To ensure that we have reserves more than enough to sustain during a major catastrophe? Aren't we a little dependent on the government to feed us? So we struggled and we will continue to struggle - That's a fact! Does that means we don't have our own means to survive?

The current government may deserve a slap on their face for having lack the emotional quotient and thinking their ways are the best. Their decision makings may not sing in tune with many on the ground but does that makes them a bad government? With the enormous track records that shows more success than failures if any. Say the opposition wins and occupy the Parliament which would automatically place current government as "new" opposition. Do you realised Singaporeans, whether the ideals of each opposition parties complement each other or clashing with each other?

They all serve a different demographics with different needs and in the process of trying to deliver what was promise, they will be busy opposing each other within the Parliament and the consequences - US! The ones who pins foolishly for hope rather than reality check and get our arses moving. And what is hugely wrong about our current government policies? Aren't they the constantly changes that we all have always benefited from? I'm not a pro-current government and yet I'm not an anti-opposition. But I will vote on the basis of who have the further foresight - to be there as a support when we fall and to pick up ourselves rather then rushing to "catch" us from hurting ourselves.

Otherwise what different it makes? How long can we last if the cost of living drop yet at the same time, the opposition digs into the reserves to absorb the impact for us when the rest of the world are getting more expensive. Don't forget, we are the only valuable resources for Singapore, the people, and we do not have any resources that we can be secure with and contented ie we will have to seek from other countries.

Vote based on emotions is easy but when the head thinks, it gets complicated. I beg to differ - the head are clearer, the heart just mess things up.

The vices of desires...

2011-03-05T13:53:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.zuji.com

When you crossed a man with savage passion and a woman with secret desires, you have a love as wild as the untamed land.. excerpts from Serita Stevens

Their lips joined together as he returned her passion, their hands roaming each other, pausing at delicate spots. His hand slipped beneath her and stroked her belly gently and tenderly as she continued her exploration of him.

A tingling she had never before experienced radiated through her whole body as the heel of his hand stopped at her Eden, pressed firmly and moving in a small, slow circle. She felt ready to his touch, as his hand continued its pressure - unrelenting, insistent, slow circles. His other hand trailed between her legs and his fingers lightly touched her other lips, trailing along from front to back slowly, just a little inside, slowly outside, around spreading wetness as she gasped, feeling the pressure building inside.

She caress his body and the softness beneath as his fingers began to explore every inch of her, outside, around, up, down, slowly in, slowly out, but each time pressing further in, harder and harder until she was riveted with pleasure once again. She was gripped with searing power, hanging onto him, as she rode wave after wave of loved and continued to feel the desire for him rushing over her... Yet he has not entered her..

He smiled and kissed her lips, silencing her and then moved his mouth further down her body. Slowly, his hand slid out of her and he rubbed her belly now with both hands, his fingers spreading her buttocks and then her lower lips. She felt the cool air upon her and she stirred, needing him within her and yet wanting whatever it was he planned to do with equal passion.

Holding her open he laid his tongue on the tip of her very essence. His fingers now stroked her blossom ever so gently; the haze of yet another mounting wave of desire drawing her higher and higher. His sinuous tongue moved gently and firmly, pushing her further. His fingers slid directly inside, firmly pressing, making her soar.

She pulled him closer, tugging at him, wanting to feel his hardness swell within her, wanting to give him the same pleasure he was giving her. He nodded and smiled as she pulled him on top of her, his hardness finding the way between her legs - poised and teasing her slightly - before sliding up and down slowly, tantalizing her once more. And then he held her as they pushed and strained against each other , wanting more as he slid inside her - hot, heaving, filling her with love.

He held her firmly and whispered in her ear as he nibbled her lobe and she clung to him, clasping hard so she could feel the contours of his probing hardness. Frozen in ecstasy, neither moved as the final tidal wave hit them, gripping and shaking - were they washed ashore together; released...

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

2011-01-25T23:14:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.razortv.com/

At one point, he handed out pens with the words ‘fact of life’ printed on the side. On stage, he had a large version of the pen, and repeatedly dropped it. The idea was that, like gravity acting on the pen, some things were just ‘facts of life.’ They cannot be changed and you have no power over them. To complain about these things or to seek to change them is, at best, a waste of time and, more often, corrosive and self-defeating.

When the courtiers of the eleventh century Danish king Cnut told their sovereign that he could turn back the tides by an act of his will, the wise king had his retinue carry a seat onto the beach. As he commanded the waves to recede, the court looked on and saw that Cnut could do nothing as the water lapped around his feet and got deeper.

This famous (and probably true) story is worth bearing in mind when things don’t go our way. Often, we are better to accept the limits of our power to change things.

Courage to change the things I can

While much cannot be changed, there are certainly things which can yield to our influence. Lasting change, however, is rarely brought about by direct action. Any sense of direct control we might have over the world around us is almost all illusion, and we would be better to think of effecting change in terms of influence.

First and foremost, change requires a positive mindset. The world we experience is, essentially, a kind of echo of our inner landscape. We make mental models which enable us to navigate through the world, and we interpret the outside world in terms of this framework. Keeping a positive mindset, then, tends to draw positive experiences towards us. From this place, we are able to act in ways which will bring about change, often in indirect and surprising ways.

Keeping a positive mindset can be difficult, especially if we are used to playing negative scripts in our head. We need to be courageous. Courage is not aggression, violence or force. It is seeing the world at its best, and it is proper action, executed in the right way and at the right time.

‘A leader is most effective when people barely know he exists. When his work is done, his aim fulfilled, his troops will feel they did it themselves.’

Action is best kept to a minimum and best kept in the background.

Wisdom to know the difference

The hardest thing of all. Sometimes, we rush in and act when we should not have done so. At other times, we hold back when, perhaps, we should have acted.

And yet perhaps it is not so difficult, after all. It seems to me that the key is being detached. When we observe in a detached way, we are more likely to make the right calls. Even when taking action, we should not be emotionally blinded by our own involvement. What matters most is the way you see the world. A great modern mystic, called it ‘being awake.’ He wrote, ‘It’s not your actions, it’s your being that counts. Then you might swing into action. You might or might not. You can’t decide that until you’re awake.’

Being awake – being aware and unattached – can make a huge difference to the way we interact with the world. When we have the ability to know when to act, how to act, and to be sufficiently dethatched as we act, our influence can be enormous.

Be happier, start by forgiving more...

It's never too late...

2011-01-02T13:53:00.004+08:00

Featured URL http://www.xinmsn.com/

What is bliss?

I've searched all over - dictionaries, wiki, internet, articles - and the only consistent explanation is extreme happiness, found through meditation.

But I'm not talking about the state of happiness or the ways to achieve it; rather the feeling of bliss..

It brings about alot of warmth, unexpected gratitude, emotions beyond descriptions.. Your pain and hurt just seems to melt away.. Surreality sets in.. Tears may well up in your eyes.. It reconstruct your views and opinions to a whole new level of understanding, peace and calmness..
Bliss does not automatically come because you and your partner love each other. Whilst love is extremely essential in to a blissful relationship, at times love is not just sufficient and may require to polish your relationship just like most other relationships. Transparency in marriage and proper consideration of your partner's feelings are two emotional features that are the answers to a blissful marriage. It is very important to recognize that a relationship is a many-sided affair that requires to be fostered in all of its ability for it to be successful.

The willingness to take sacrifices is a single secret to a blissful relationship. The partners must be ready to put their other half's happiness ahead of theirs occasionally for the relationship to really work. Sometimes the sacrifices might be immense but most regularly it is the little things stuff matter most. Let your partner know that you care about them and are willing to go a mile to please them oftentimes.

The other secret is to uphold a warm and loving relationship with your partner. Having physical bond with you partner will help you maintain blissful relationship. Little gestures like hugs and holding hands or physical intimacy present to you the chance to re-connect with your partner everyday.

Impulsiveness is also an essential part of a blissful relationship. Letting yourselves to descend in to a routine pattern could lead to monotony but being a spur-of-the-moment at times will put off dullness from creeping in and help maintain the relationship in an interesting lane.

Keep in mind the reasons as to why you are with you partner; remember that it is one of the most significant secrets to a blissful relationship. Always appreciating the uniqueness in your partner that attracted you to your partner will always remind you to never forget your love for your spouse. It will also make sure that they are always lovely before your eyes. Many things could change all through your relationship, but the one stuff that will never change is the reason why you fell in love initially.

Tender bliss how did you find me in the dark with all my troubles
collecting like coins in a wishing well,
under pain concrete form,
a flower breaks
through the crack of my once cold, solid shell.

Stay with me bliss ,
never leave me again,
for my need is great and my patience is plentiful.
Lessons I need not learn again,
forget where I have been.

Let me walk in the sweet embrace of a love's sacrifice,
and not forget it tender kiss of compassion.
Hold me in the arms of your unfolding grace
and we will put back all the fallen stars in the sky.

The heart is racing.. Perhaps it has heal and in the right place..

love confessions...

2010-12-22T00:50:00.006+08:00

Featured URL http://www.youtube.com/

For the ultimate reading pleasure.. To be used discreetly..

Now what would I say...

It's better to love than not be loved at all...

2010-12-09T06:28:00.002+08:00

Featured URL http://www.medicellpharma.com/

What sustains a love relationship? Is it the romantic candlelight dinner or the extravagant gifts? Do your journey to the exotic destinations and all those naughty things really sustain your love relationship? Even though these are stimulating factors in a love relationship, the sustaining factor lies behind them. It is the unchallenged expectation for the partner's affection that really sustains a love relationship.

Many people take the love and affection of your partners for granted. It is the worst mistake that lead their love affair to a chaotic whirlpool. Many people enjoy their loved one roaming around them like a honeybee and covering them with praises. But alas! When the time arises for them to show a sign of affection, ego simply pulls them away from the action.

The busy businessman accidentally confessed his love to an ambitious woman from the software industry. He quite enjoyed her frequent phone calls and never recognized his need to call her back. He neither doubted his worthiness nor bothered the reducing phone calls from his partner. He realized a missing link only when his equally magnanimous lady love returned all the couriered gifts and finally called to say 'good bye'.

The software engineer from the metro city has a different story to tell. The frequent phone calls and customary meetings with his lady love never freed him from the ultimate dilemma. He felt neglected whenever his lover indulged in long conversations over the phone during those meetings. There was a not a long courtship period between them to choose two diverse paths.

What would say to the stories above? It may sound silly and you may laugh at these. The well brought up sons and daughters may cite these as the excellent examples of lack of adjustment and ego clash in relationships. However before you set aside these failed romances from your intellectual mind, just wait to ponder over the situations once again.

Here comes the crucial question. Why you love someone? Even though you belong to those sublime selfless beings, you may expect a minimal care and affection from your loved one. Isn't it always? Everyone wants a pampering for their wandering mind and in the least expect it from their lover. You may love the person most above their beauty, power, wealth or caliber for his/her kind word or affectionate caring.

You may realize now, what difference you can make to your lover's life with a simple act of affection. Here comes the second rule, "Never expect anything from your love." This may come as a surprise for you since you are expecting an equal reward for your affection. Unfortunately, your lover's way of showing affection may be different from your method. The worst result is that your anticipation will make you blind towards your lover's love expressions.

Many lovers may find that their gestures of love are lost unnoticed at many times. It is the time to put aside ego. Go to your lover grab his/her arm, look into the eyes and tell " I love you" or do acts that they least expect of you. This will bring your lover to express the suppressed emotions and feelings towards you. Miraculously, they will take you as the most romantic person on earth.
Expectations and dreams may add more sizzle to your romantic life. However encouragement to your lover may bring out something more for you and sharing the dream together will make love life wonderful.

what others think of you is really none of your business...

2010-11-14T20:48:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.amex.com/

I'm hurt, devastated, betrayed... I felt unjust, wrong, sickened.. and the most stupid thing was I'm fighting inside to find solace that the people who did this is after all human and I should forgive their flaws...

My demons have completely taken over me - the picture that I fought so hard to achieve, the kind of future that I worked my arse off - are really disillusioned. I can't blamed the environment, I can't blame how she feels, I can't blame anything and that's the most frustrating part. It will be so easy to put a blame on someone or something so I could be more specific to where I should place my attention on.

Really.. there is no other better words that lost here.. I'm angry, pissed, enraged.. I felt like going on a rampage but this stubborn mind would like to settle for a long break and settle this heart that has endlessly face abused.

The tears just kept on dwelling. I know my current actions will only hurt those whom I care for more but I can't helped it. I need to be at the stage where I can think more clearly. I reasoned myself hard what have I been living my life for. Someone asked me what kind of legacy would I want to live behind - I never thought much about it because I don't see why I have to live for the memories of others. It's mine to keep.

"If you are stuck in a desert, will you be disappointed when the dark clouds you see and the howling wind you hear bring no rain? Is the disappointment no less when someone you trust does not do what is promised?"

It's all about expectations and perception - coloured by emotions. Who are you to say you did the right things by sharing?! Who are you to judge when things are not exemplified or proven? What kind of human are you if the major part of your life is to care about what other people think of you or that you are so busy sharing your opinions thinking it's the benefit of others?

Even if I hear what other people say about you - I kept my stand - I don't spread the hearsay and I just shared that it's none of their business to say that of the colleagues around. You don't have to like me - that I'm not asking - but you don't go around making your opinions or judgement saying why would she even want to go out with me!

Don't likened your sense of justice to that of good morals, values or principles - respect your space - respect yourself! If people make you feel like god - don't even think for a second you are one! If people make you feel you are a villain - don't even for a second you believe that! Who you are, you will always be searching.

"...integrity one of the six essential qualities that are the key to success. The other five are sincerity, humility, courtesy, wisdom and charity."

Know what?! You are not even closed to embody the above mentioned! Even then I don't find the situation(s) where I feel I should make any judgement and share my opinions.

It is said we can practise integrity through the simple acts of...
Doing what we say we will do: This is a common definition of integrity and a basic practice. It includes keeping even the smallest of promises, meeting deadlines and starting classes on time. - Did you?!

Doing the right thing: With the awareness of what is right comes the obligation of right action. That means upholding our belief and values even when we are feeling stressed or pressurised. However, integrity is not simply standing by our own ideals just to be rigid. It is also not saying whatever is on our mind and hurt other people if our intention is to show that we are more superior than them. Integrity is about honesty and inspiring others. - At this stage, I'm incline to think you are of such!

Taking responsibility for our actions: We must acknowledge our responsibility for every one of our actions. Do not blame other people or other factors. When we see something that we don’t like, we take responsibility to change or accept it openly. - If you don't have the moral courage, don't pretend you have by sharing other people's back!

Treating others with respect: We should treat others with respect even though they may not live up to our expectations. We must not disclose the information to other people without the permission of the others. It would be difficult for them to open up and discuss their problems freely with us if we cannot gain their trust and respect. Also, we should not talk or do something behind others’ back. - Hah, the truth of it all!

Back off!!

I want you to know I'm scared... to lose you.. I'm not sayong it's your fault...

2010-10-30T19:35:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.nutririonpark.com/

Had we lived one hundred and twenty years ago we would not have heard the plural noun "values," meaning the moral beliefs and attitudes of a society. Until then the word "value" was used only as a verb meaning to value or esteem something or as a singular noun, meaning the measure of a thing, for example, the economic value of money, labour or property.

Over the years the concept of values was absorbed unconsciously and without resistance into the ethos of modern society just as the word values was absorbed into the vocabulary. Values have become whatever any individual, group or society chooses for any reason. The old virtues have been demoralized and personalized to become values.

With the growing use of the word values, the word virtues; those traits of character that aspire to moral excellence like honesty, compassion, courage and perseverance, fell into disuse. But contrary to people's belief and hope, virtues did not die but become regarded as moral or objective core values.

Values, as we now know them, can be either preferences or principles, which represent the opposite ends of the moral spectrum.

Values that are preferences, like any other preferences, whether it is for tea or coffee, for long rather than short hair, are personal choices that are subjective and able to be changed at any time. On the other hand, values that are principles, like honesty and compassion, are consistent, universal, transcultural and objective.

The greatest difference between the two types of values is that preference values are some thing "to have," in the same way as one may have a skateboard or a bag of marbles, while values that are principles, are something "to be." In fact, the most important thing to be, like, honest, kind, compassionate and responsible.

Many did not understand was that virtues, moral or objective core values, worked in three interrelated parts; moral knowing, moral feeling and moral behaviour, that connect to good character.

To possess the objective core value of, for example, compassion, one must first understand what compassion is and know what it requires of one's relationship to others. To be compassionate one must have moral knowledge, but that does not make one compassionate.

That requires the addition of a moral feeling about compassion, being emotionally committed to it, having the capacity for appropriate discomfort when one behaves without compassion, and being capable of moral indignation when one sees others victims of suffering, exploitation or greed.

But again, moral knowledge and moral feeling do not make one compassionate. One must behave with compassion; acting compassionately in one's personal relationships and carrying out one's obligations as a citizen to help build a caring and just society.

Compassion, like all objective core values, requires the involvement of the head and the heart together with the hand.

The three parts of an objective core value, moral knowledge, moral feeling and moral behaviour are directly linked to good character. Good character is the habit of knowing the good, the habit of desiring the good and the habit of doing the good.

The teaching of objective core values like honesty, kindness, compassion, respect and responsibility by parents and schools is essential if communities are to restore and advance their social cohesion.

Well, I swear I'm having a hard time myself - trying to manage. And that managing is driving me crazy and understandably, pushing you away instead. Yes, I've tried joking about it, keeping it repress and looking at your stand - it's hard indefinitely, especially the way I looked at it hollistically.

Maybe the best way to resolve 2 people standing on different circles is really for one party to give in. And there is no other answer to it than myself...

If nobody is perfect, it is perfect to be nobody…

2010-09-27T00:34:00.002+08:00

Featured URL www.facebook.com/outwardboundprofessional

“Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.” ~ Chinese Proverb

The realization that the hyper-intentional pursuit of trying to be somebody other than one’s self is a misguided (and entirely too common) pursuit influenced by the ever-presence and dominance of social conventions and media noise.

From childhood, social messages implicitly and explicitly tell you how to behave, what image to portray, what products will supposedly provide the perception of such an image, what to study in college, and what career to pursue (usually based upon money and social status). This is the essence of the social message, “be somebody.”

If you aspire, however, to be nobody, you aspire to be nothing at all except the authentic self; because to be nobody you are not trying to be anything at all; and because you are not trying to be anything at all, the natural and authentic self shines through. Would you rather be somebody or would you rather be yourself? If you are not happy with yourself at the present moment, it is probably because you are trying to be somebody else. Think about that…
“You spent the first half of your life becoming somebody. Now you can work on becoming nobody, which really somebody. For when you become nobody there is no tension, no pretense, no one trying to be anyone or anything. The natural state of the mind shines through unobstructed…” ~ Ram Dass

To be nobody, be:

•Content: Find ways to notice and appreciate your current existence. The present moment is where you will always be. If you are not happy with what you are and what you have now, how can you expect to be happy with more? If you become somebody else and obtain something else, you will grow tired of the new existence or the new thing and you will continue the proverbial carrot chase that never really ends: You are in a constant state of Becoming; and you never enter the state of Being. It is not wrong to want more but it is certainly unhealthy to want to be someone else or to want more without being content with who you are and what you have now.

•Accepting: Most suffering is the failure to accept transience. Everything is changing, evolving. Changes are not always in your favor but they may be seen as opportunities to grow.
•Aware: To be aware, among many other things, is to know the extent to which you are influenced from outside sources. You don’t have to wear a gunny sack for clothes, eat weeds and seeds, and live on Walden pond to find the authentic self. Just be aware of your purchases, pursuits and external desires and decide if they are helping you become somebody (someone else) or to be nobody (yourself).

•Reflective: Often ask yourself two questions, “Who am I?” and “Why do I live?” and do your best to answer the them (or come closer every day to the answers).

•Giving: The dedication to a cause greater than oneself, with little or no selfish motives, is the greatest enabler of meaning and fulfillment (and hence success). In other words, not caring about success will sooner provide a higher quality of success than a hyper-intentional desire to quickly create it.

“We get so much in the habit of wearing disguises before others that we finally appear disguised before ourselves.” ~ Francois de la Rochefoucauld

Who are you? Are you wearing a disguise or can you be naked before others? Can you smile without a mask?

Any fools can criticise - and many of them do

2010-08-30T22:35:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.classicinsults.com/

In a frust mood swings recently - actually a 180 degrees turn!.. It's been awhile since I last visited this dark part of me.. I don't exactly know what started it.. Could be I read too much into such but then again, what's with the lack of encouragement?!? Does it mean that every freaking things we do is susceptible to critics and those so called god damned constructive feedbacks?

I've been around enough to know what I can do and cannot do.. What I cannot do is when people around are so keen with limiting creative thinking and boundaries... Why the hell then are they using their brain for? Why not just get some programming jammed nut into their soul-less body?
I'm sorry I just don't get it.. I've stayed quiet far too long; be patience about it far too long; cornered into agreeing far too long!!! I've been trying to understand over and over again and again and whatever carefully crafted words you used - it just doesn't buy me over!

For god sake; please preach what you are saying.. You wanted outward bound, taught about how we should stretch at the same time, you baulked at the idea of going through the journey itself.
What a freak! It's just my first time anyway and the least kind of feedback would have been how you appreciate it in my shoes! Just being mum about how I truly feels doesn't mean I'm automatically can be treated like a 2nd class citizen - changing as and when, pretending to be supportive yet grumble at the back.. I doubt your so called professionalism..

Something is definitely brewing inside me.. I don't know what's coming but somehow guilty to let you go through the innate part of me.. I am without fault and I couldn't help thinking I might have let you down abit with my elaborated thoughts and desire - what I want, what I picture, what I truly feel like doing..

It didn't quite fit into your picture that was why there was such concerns... I can only fault myself.. Horrible maybe.. heavy hearted definitely.. I just wished I could take back the descriptive moments and shoved it off into the dark crevices of my brain.. Really.. Perhaps then, I wouldn't feel such torn..

What you keep to yourself you lose, What you give away, you keep forever...

2010-08-15T14:39:00.004+08:00

Featured URl http://www.nokia.com.sg/

A new chapter arrives - promises of emotional safety, walls that hold fort and guarded the fragility for ages to crumble down with no existence of it's being... Pamela used to say "Love is a wonderful thing as you never have to take it away from another person to give it to another.. There's always more than enough to go around...

I'm not sure if she has forgotten about the pain that envelopes with it too..

Before your timely arrival, my heart is empty;

tears flow , the eyes are dry;

Too long has discouragement bound me;

You lift my sould, you let me fly.

My hope was diminished and only you can tell me of faith and love;

Remind me that we are created;

To live on earth as in heaven above.

So tell me a story to fill my heart with compassion;

Open my eyes so I won't be blind;

Remind me that all mankind are good;

That we all should be loving and kind.

Serve me with another helping of your tempting passion for my soul;

To seduce me, to love and let us encourage each other;

That higher dimensions of love may we know...

Change is the only constant - but why is it hard to stick to it..

2010-08-15T14:30:00.002+08:00

Featured URL http://www.flickr.com/

A lot of us try – and try hard – to make changes in our lives. We’re keen, we’re motivated, we may even have a step-by-step plan.

For a while, it works. Maybe we successfully start eating more healthily, or take up an exercise routine. Maybe we manage to leave work at 5pm every day. Maybe we take a big step – like starting a family or quitting a job – and hope that this solves problems, like our struggles with time-management or our tendency to procrastinate.

Being inspired to change is great. But it’s hard to ignore the reality that lots of us want to change – and lots of us do start making changes – only to end up backsliding.

So why does this happen?

Here are a few possibilities.

We Made the Wrong Change
When you’re trying to change a particular aspect of your life, it’s worth thinking through why.

Maybe you want to be thinner. Is that because you’re motivated by health concerns? Or because you feel that you “should” lose weight to fit society’s ideal?

Maybe you’re keen to quit your job and go back to college. Are you motivated by finally following your dreams? Or do you think that you “should” have a degree?

It’s very easy to end up pushed towards a change because friends, parents or society are putting pressure on us (not necessarily deliberately). The problem is, any initial motivation for this sort of change fades quickly.

Next time you’re thinking of making a big change, give yourself some time to mull it over and asked what do you really want? Perhaps you don’t actually want to be thinner – you just want to be confident and happy in your own body. (And therapy – or just a new wardrobe – could be your way forwards.) Perhaps you really enjoy your job, and you don’t want to claw your way up the career ladder.

We Gave Up Too Soon
Even if you go for a change which you really want, it’s still very easy to lose your way. I find that when I’m keen and motivated, the path ahead looks easy. I can see my destination shining in the sun, and it looks like a pleasant stroll to get there.

It’s only once I’m travelling that path that I realise there are stones to stumble over, thorns which clutch at my legs. The destination looks further and further away. The path which seemed so straight twists and turns, and I find myself looking back at the way I came … and it looks so much easier there.

Does that happen to you too? It’s probably a good thing that we underestimate how hard change will be: otherwise, we’d never get started! However, it’s important to recognise that the fact that we’re struggling doesn’t mean we’re on the wrong path.

Next time you’re tempted to give up on a particular change in your life, look for a different route forwards. Have you made it harder than it needs to be? Can someone else lend you a helping hand? Can you take a breather to recover your motivation – and then carry on?

We Got Dragged Down
Sometimes, the problem isn’t that motivation is lacking. We’re going along well – but something happens which derails us. It might even seem like all our hard work is undone.

These factors might not be in your control. You get sick and you can’t stick to an exercise routine. There’s a downturn in the market, and your business suffers. A family crisis means you have to set aside your big project.

In those cases, there’s no way you can prevent them happening (though you might be able to take preventative action to lessen the impact). You have to roll with them – and, rather than giving up, accept a delay in the change which you’re trying to implement in your life.

Other times, you’ve got a bit more control (even though it doesn’t always feel like it). You go on vacation and pig out, putting on the 4lbs you’d lost. You let your friends’ negative attitude sap your confidence. You go shopping to make yourself feel better, and put it all on your credit card.

How can you avoid getting dragged down? A site suggest:

•Keep your attention on your goal – the change you’re trying to make. Write it out somewhere you can see it every day, or find some other visual reminder to keep close at hand.
•Take responsibility for the things you can control. I’m great at making excuses myself, but I know that it’s my choice to eat unhealthily, to skip exercise sessions or to over-commit myself.
•Find sources of support. Friends, family, colleagues or like-minded groups can all make the difference when it comes to going the distance. Being able to accept help is a sign of strength and maturity.

Whatever change you’re currently trying to make in your life, be proud of yourself for giving it a go. Don’t beat yourself up when you find the path gets hard – but find the motivation and support which you need to carry on.

However big and overwhelming your goal might seem – or however small and unimportant – you can go the distance.

Your eye is like the lens of a camera.. Beauty is in the eye's of the beholder.. Look beyond that tinted lens and you might discover more..

2010-07-28T23:50:00.002+08:00

Featured URl www.citibank.com

The girl is Katie Kirkpatrick, she is 21. Her fiancé, Nick, 23.
Katie has terminal cancer and spends hours a day receiving medication. Nick is always waiting for her on one of the many sessions of chemo to end.

In spite of all the pain, organ failures, and morphine shots, Katie is going along with her wedding and took care of every detail. The dress had to be adjusted a few times due to her constant weight loss.

An unusual accessory at the party was the oxygen tube that Katie used throughout the ceremony and reception as well. The other happy couple are Nick’s parents. Excited to see her son marrying his high school sweetheart.

Katie, was in her wheelchair with the oxygen tube , listening to a song from her husband and friends.

At the reception, Katie had to take a few rests. The pain restricts her to stand up for long periods.

Katie died five days after her wedding day. Watching a women so ill and weak getting married and with a smile on her face makes us think…..

Happiness is reachable, no matter how long it lasts. We should stop making our lives complicated.

A little love for thought…

Life is short
Break the rules
Forgive quickly
Kiss passionately, Love truly
Laugh constantly
And never stop smiling
No matter how strange life is
Life is not always the party we expected to be
But as long as we are here, we should smile and be grateful.

Truth is in the eyes of the beholders.. was it...

2010-07-01T15:16:00.002+08:00

Featured URL http://www.stompers.com.sg/

As employees, we are told to be diligent, to follow through, to be "self-starters," to have a good attitude, to be flexible and patient and dependable and loyal and respectful. We're told there is no "I" in "team." We're told, "You should just be grateful you have a job." But surely bosses have obligations to us just as we do to them. And surely one of the biggest of those obligations is to seek out their employees' point of view.

Of course, not all employees feel free to say what they're actually thinking. You know who you are! That's why in today's column, the employees of the world get to speak up. What would you say to your boss if you could say absolutely anything at all? This is your chance, people.

Here are a dozen to get you warmed up:

1. "Give me the tools I need to do a good job." If you're unsure, ask me. But, basically, time, materials, information, maybe even a little authority--these are what I need to succeed.

2. "Admit it when you make a mistake." It shows you're not afraid and is the best way to earn my respect. Whatever you do, don't act as if you never make mistakes. That's just ridiculous.

3. "Don't treat me like a cog on a wheel." I'm an individual. If I screw up, tell me. If someone else in my group screws up, tell him. Don't blame the whole team.

4. "Ask for my opinion from time to time." I might be able to offer some good ideas if you listened to me even half as much as you expect me to listen to you.

5. "I truly need frequent feedback." Please don't wait till the year-end performance review. I can do a better job for you if you let me know what I'm doing wrong, and what I'm doing right, on a regular basis.

6. "Don't leave me hanging out to dry." When things go south I need you to be a leader and back me up. If you are not loyal to me, it is impossible for me to be loyal to you.

7. "I can't hear you when you shout." Maybe someone once told you intimidation is a good management tool. But seriously, yelling at employees just makes you look weak and ineffectual.

8. "Don't make me work with idiots." I realize it's not easy but if there's a problem person in the group it's your job to resolve the situation. Don't let it drag on and on. It poisons the whole workplace.

9. "Have a clear agenda." If you don't know what you want, how do you expect me to? I need you to understand your own goals, and communicate them to me clearly.

10. "Don't lie about deadlines." There is no better way to lose the trust of your people than to set "fake" deadlines. Trust me enough to be honest with me and I'll do a good job for you.

11. "Be predictable." If you behave erratically I will spend more time and energy worrying about what you're going to do next than working.

12. "Mentor me." Ask me my goals. Give me projects that help me develop and grow. I will do a fabulous job for you if you take an interest in me and my career. And that's a win-win.

Cool.. I have always wanted to say that!

The day you were born; you were meant to marvel me...

2010-06-12T13:21:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.aceinsurance.com.sg/

Words of Affirmation—Actions don’t always speak louder than words. Of the countless ways we can show love to one another, five key categories, or five love languages, proved to be universal and comprehensive—everyone has a love language, and we all identify primarily with one of the five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.

Words of Affirmation

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.

Quality Time

In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.

Receiving Gifts

Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.

Acts of Service

Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.

Physical Touch

This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.

For whatever reason, people are usually drawn to those who speak a different love language than their own.

No one teaches you to be (....), but my god, you will learn; you'll really learn!

2010-06-12T13:11:00.004+08:00

Featured URL www.passiveaggressivenotes.com

We are experts at wronging each other, but when it comes to setting things right, we all could use some help. Surprisingly, saying “I’m sorry,” isn’t primarily a matter of will—it’s a matter of how.

Expressing Regret

“Expressing Regret” is the Apology Language that zeroes in on emotional hurt. It is an admission of guilt and shame for causing pain to another person. For those who listen for “Expressing Regret” apologies, a simple “I’m sorry” is all they look for. There is no need for explanation or “pay back” provided the apology has truly come from the heart. “Expressing Regret” is a powerful Apology Language because it gets right to the point. It doesn’t make excuses or attempt to deflect blame. Above all, “Expressing Regret” takes ownership of the wrong. For that reason, “Expressing Regret” is understood as a sincere commitment to repair and rebuild the relationship. The “Expressing Regret” Apology Language speaks most clearly when the person offering the apology reflects sincerity not only verbally, but also through body language. Unflinching eye contact and a gentle, but firm touch are two ways that body language can underscore sincerity.

Accept Responsibility

It is very difficult for some people to admit that they’re wrong. It makes them doubt their self-worth, and no one likes to be portrayed as a failure. However, as adults, we must all admit that we are sinners and that we will make mistakes. We are going to make poor decisions that hurt our mates, and we are going to have to admit that we were wrong. We have to accept responsibility for our own failures. For many individuals, all they want is to hear the words, “I am wrong.” If the apology neglects accepting responsibility for their actions, many partners will not feel as though the apology was meaningful and sincere. Many partners need to learn how to overcome their ego, the desire to not be viewed as a failure, and simply admit that their actions were wrong. For a mate who speaks this apology language, if an apology does not admit fault, it is not worth hearing. Being sincere in your apology means allowing yourself to be weak, and admitting that you make mistakes. Though this may be hard to do for some people, it makes a world of a difference to your partner who speaks this language.

Make Restitution

In our society, many people believe that wrong acts demand justice. The one who commits the crime should pay for their wrongdoing. A mate who speaks this love language feels the same way towards apologies. They believe that in order to be sincere, the person who is apologizing should justify their actions. The mate who’s been hurt simply wants to hear that their mate still loves them.

There are many effective ways to demonstrate sincerity in an apology. Each mate must learn the other’s love language in order to complete the act of restitution. Though some mates may feel a though all is forgotten with a bouquet of flowers, that may not necessarily work for all mates. Every mate should uncover what their partner’s main love language is (Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, and Receiving Gifts) and use that specific language in order to make restitution in the most effective way.

For a mate whose primary apology language is making restitution, no matter how often you say “I’m sorry”, or “I was wrong”, your mate will never find the apology sincere. You must show strong efforts for making amends. A genuine apology will be accompanied by the assurance that you still love your mate  and have a desire to right the wrong-doings committed.

Genuinely Repent

For some individuals, repentance is the convincing factor in an apology. Some mates will doubt the sincerity of an apology if it is not accompanied by their partner’s desire to modify their behavior to avoid  the situation in the future.

It’s important to remember that all true repentance begins in the heart. A mate must feel poorly for hurting their loved one, and rely on God’s help in order to truly change. Admitting you are wrong creates vulnerability. It allows your mate to get a glimpse of your heart. The glimpse of true self is assurance that the apology was sincere.

One important aspect of genuinely repenting is verbalizing your desire to change. Your mate cannot read your mind. Though you may be trying to change inside, if you do not verbalize your desire to change to your mate, most likely they will still be hurt.

Many people have problems with repenting when they do not feel as though their actions were morally wrong. However, in a healthy relationship, we often make changes that have nothing to do with morality and everything to do with building a harmonious marriage.

It is also important to make a dedicated plan for change. Often apologies involving repentance fail because the person never set up steps of action to help ensure success. A person must first set goals for their change. After you create realistic goals, then you can start implementing a plan to change. Taking baby steps towards repentance instead of insisting on changing all at once will increase your chances of successfully changing your ways.

It is important to remember that change is hard. Constructive change does not mean we will immediately be successful. There will be highs and lows on the road to change. You must remember that with God’s help, anyone can change their ways if they are truly and genuinely ready to repent.

Request Forgiveness

In some relationships, a mate wants to hear their partner physically ask for forgiveness. They want assurance that their mate recognizes the need for forgiveness. By asking forgiveness for their actions, a partner is really asking their mate to still love them. Requesting forgiveness assures your mate that you want to see the relationship fully restored. It also proves to your mate that you are sincerely sorry for what you’ve done. It shows that you realize you’ve done something wrong. Requesting forgiveness also shows that you are willing to put the future of the relationship in the hands of the offended mate. You are leaving the final decision up to your partner – to forgive or not forgive.

Requesting forgiveness is not easy. It often leaves one vulnerable to the fear of rejection. Along with the fear of rejection is the fear of failing. Many people have a hard time seeking forgiveness because it means admitting that you have failed. The only way to overcome this fear is to recognize that it is very common amongst mankind. The commonality makes it okay to be a failure. It allows a stubborn mate to apologize to their partner and become a healthy individual.

Ultimately, it’s important to remember that there is a difference between asking for forgiveness and DEMANDING forgiveness. When we demand forgiveness, we tend to forget the nature of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a choice the offended party is supposed to make. Demanding forgiveness takes away the sincerity of asking for it.

Remember not to treat forgiveness lightly. It is something to be cherished and appreciated. The act of forgiveness is hard on both ends – for the person who’s asking and for the person who’s accepting.

Differences create the challenges in life that open the door to discovery...

2010-05-09T20:41:00.004+08:00

Featured URL http://www.nea.gov.sg/

I asked myself have I really move on? I seems to be riding waves after waves, just occasionally looking back not because of regrets but unresolved issues that could be well creep into my future.. I'm well aware that it is those little pesky are the ones eating me out slowly but surely..

Sometimes I let the past haunt me.. It's quite unbearable to resist true and true.. Only solitude provides that temporary shelter for e to carry on breathing as though everything else's doesn't matter..

Peers and family asked am I attached, when am I getting hitched, how's my dates? Truth? I cannot answer for certain about what the future holds for me in that arena.. Guess shutting that department down allows me to focus other matters at hand..

I have turned creative in answering that question though.. "Wait till you are married and have 5 children".. I always drew laughter and flaks but hey, it put them off my back.. It sounds almost impossible right - oh well - I take pride in knowing my tongue am pretty talented in time of need...

So sue me if I said I still sense about her.. Sometimes I was playing hide and seek with fate to let me come across her path by accident.. I don't know what am I thinking but I just thought if I see her for one time, I may actually be able to answer myself.. Her things are left untouched in my room - almost a reminder how none stayed in the end to nurse this fragile, broken heart..

My bet, I guess! Moving on, I have finally make the leap to move up in my career.. A mixed feeling of uncertainties and elatedness.. I'm not sure if that is what I had hope for in the first place but it's something that I know will fill up the feeling of void that I have had for a very long time..

In retrospect, it looks like I am being scouted for the position but I couldn't help feeling I was thrust in instead.. Hell! So I labelled myself. I need to be aware of my emotional quotient otherwise it be an insult to my intelligence. In summary, I will try to keep as open mind as possible but it sure damned difficult to stay afloat.. You know, people who like to think a lot, always putting themselves in so called objective light, they should be taught to think with their heart at times. It's ridiculous when God have give us the 2 most bestest gift and yet, many of us are not in tuned in tapping the fullest potential from it..

Wisdom does not comes easy - so don't make that mistake. When you want to learn as badly as you wanted to breathe, then I be ready to accept you in my conversation.. Nothing in life comes easy!

There is dignity in work only when it is freely accepted...

2010-04-17T08:51:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.newurbanmale.com

There are 2 good reasons to do your best -

Firstly, when you do your 100%, you are happier. Remember back in your school days how it felt like walking to school, especially on those days you had done all your homework - and done your best! Didn't you feel just a bit more enthusiastic?

It doesn't matter you have been in and out of school for as long as you can remember, the homework principles still applies. Your teachers, your parents, your bosses - all have asked of you to work hard but you don't work hard to please them but you do it for you...

Secondly, the universe has a way of punishing laziness and arrogance. Enough things will go wrong in your life - and work - without your giving a half-hearted effort. When we get casual, things start to collapse. Ask any boxer who underestimates his opponent or the businessmen who underestimates his competition. There's a word to describe giving it your best shot every time - it's called professionalism..

People who enjoy their work wake up saying: "Today I am going to be a bit more effective, and more caring than I was yesterday." They don't always hit the bull's eye but it's their aim..

"It takes more than talent to stay at the top"

Be the living expression of God's kidness; kindness in your face, kindness in your heart, kindness in your smile...

2010-03-20T10:32:00.005+08:00

Featured URL http://www.ulfp.com/

What is it that moves our soul? Great movie? Good book? What can deeply inspires us? Music? or Art?

Soul is the center, wherein lie the deepest conviction and values. It is the source for purpose, meaning and inner peace. "Inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up"...

Some people got strength from writing journal, listening to good music or spending solo time. "Men and women who turn their lives over to God will find out that he can make alot more out of their lives than they can. He will deepen their joys, expand their vision, quicken their minds, strengthen their muscles, lift their spirits, multiply their blessings, increase their opportunities and pour out peace"

One of the things that haven't fail me is getting back at nature. There's always something magical about it that just can't be matched. Even if you are living near the city, there will always be parks, beaches that you can visit.

At many points, I always dwell through my darkest period where everything just seemed to caved in. That's when I realised, there is a secluded place amongst nature that became my escape. No one around, no people to talk or hear; it was just beautiful and peaceful. I can run around/ swim around and it will make me feel at peace. It was like my life is back to normal..

Some people would turn to religion. I do have and and I'm pretty sure I'm strong in it. But it's just hard for me when people keep saying, "Oh just be happy. It will work out. Just have faith." Personally I do not think much of that because my life is messed up at such points.

But going to my hideout, the place didn't judge me. That place didn't tell me what to do. It was just there. And following it's example, the peacefulness and the serenity that existed there, that's all it takes for me to calm things down and make me feel as though everything was going to work out...

Your soul is a very private area of your life.. There will always be a way to feed it...

Happiness.. It's something we all want.. I want..

2010-02-16T22:58:00.006+08:00

Featured URL www.lg.com/notebook

Do we really appreciate what makes us happy? Perhaps is is best that we understand what makes us happy.. Only if we don't fall into the trap of chasing someone else's version of the word..

Love

There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved...

Living in harmony

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony...

Enjoying today

It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis...

A state of mind

Most folks are about as happy as they make up their mind to be...

Is something that comes naturally

If you observe a really happy man you will find him building a boat, writing a symphony, educating his son, growing dahlias in his garden. He will not be searching for happiness as if it were a collar button that has rolled under the radiator...

Experiencing both pleasure and meaning

Happiness is the overall experience of pleasure and meaning...

Lies in the thrill of creative effort

Happiness is not in the mere possession of money; it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort...

Appreciating what we have

We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have...

The meaning of life

Happiness is the meaning and purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence...

Hopefully, it gave you key insights into what happiness really is...

Spring is the ultimate reminder - to begin again... Everything that was old, dead, drab will begin again; anew, afresh and growing...

2010-02-10T09:00:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.flickr.com/

It was the best times, it was the worst of time; it was the age of wisdom; it was the age of foolishness; it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of insecurity; it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us; we were all going directly to Heaven, we were all going the other way...

Is this the darkest era or a time of limited possibilities? More than just simply labelling this viewpoints as "optimistic" or "pessimistic", it's important to notice that how we choose to look at situations changes our outcomes..

I recalled the fable of the blind men and the elephant. A story originate from India, the core of the tale is that a group of blind men encountering an elephant for the first time..

Each blind man touches a different part, but only one part - such as the side or the tusk. They then compare notes on what they felt - "an elephant is a wall!", "no, no, an elephant is like a sharp spear!" - and learn they are in complete disagreement as to what an elephant is...

"Reality" and "truth" vary depending upon our perspective, meaning that what can seem like an absolute truth is actually quite subjective based on what data we choose to use to gather and create hypothesis. Our beliefs in turn drive our actions.

Whether you are faced with diminishing resources within your organisation, a lay-off or a serious illness, is a door opening or closing? How you choose to look at and respond to the situation - as an opportunity to reorganize, reinvent or re prioritize - is up to you..

"This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do with it...

What perspective(S) will I choose today - god knows.. How does that influence the actions I take on - by god's grace - have faith..

Life is not a race.. Take it slower.. and hear the music before the song is over...

2010-01-23T10:04:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.ntucincome.com.sg/

There was a rich merchant who had 4 wives. H loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treat her to delicacies. He took great care of her and gave nothing but the best...

He also loved the 3rd wife very much. He's proud of her and always wanted to show off her to his friends. However, the merchant is always in great fear that she might run away with some other men.

He too loved his 2nd wife. She is a very considerate person, always patient and in fact is the merchant's confidante. Whenever the merchant faced some problems, he always turned to his 2nd wife and she would always help him out and tide him through difficult times.

Now, the merchant 1st wife is a very loyal partner and has made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and business as well as taking care of the household. However the merchant did not love her although she loved him deeply, he hardly notice her...

One day the merchant fell ill and before long he knew that he was going to die soon. He thought of his luxurious life and told himself , "Now I have 4 wives with me, But when I die, I'll be alone. How lonely I'll be!"

Thus he asked the 4th wife, "I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No way!" replied the 4th wife and she walked away without another word.

The answer cut like a sharp knife right through his heart. He then asked his 3rd wife the same question. "No!" she replied, "Life is so good here! I'm going to remarry when you die!" The merchant's heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the 2nd wife. "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" she replied. "At the most, I can only send you to your grave". The answer came like a bolt of thunder and the merchant was devastated.

Then a voice called out. "I'll leave with you, I'll follow you no matter where you go." The merchant looked up and there was his 1st wife. She was so skinny, almost like she suffered from malnutrition. Greatly grieved, the merchant said "I should have taken much better care of you while I could have!"

We all have 4 wives in our lives.

The 4th wife is our body - no matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die...

Our 3rd wife is our possessions/ wealth/ status - when we die, they all go to others...

Our 2nd wife is our family and friends - no matter how close they have been there for us, the furthest they can stay is up to the grave...

The 1st wife is in fact our soul, often neglected in our pursuit of material, wealth and sensual pleasure. It is actually the only thing that follows us whenever we go. Perhaps it's a good idea to cultivate and strengthen it now rather than to wait till we're on our deathbed to lament...

'It takes a thousand voices to tell a single story...

2010-01-01T21:14:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.wikipedia.com

Here's a few quotes to begin with...

Life is not meant to be a struggle but a balanced and joyful journey...

Always more often than not and without you realising it, there is an answer when you ran up against a wall...

Don't look down and curse, look up and reach for an even higher and even better possibilities...

No act of kindness no matter how small, is ever wasted...

Live life to it's fullest...

I never said it would be easy but I would said it would be worth it...

Today is tomorrow I worried about yesterday, and today was such a lovely day that I wondered why I worried about today yesterday...
So today I'm not going to worry about tomorrow, there may not be even a tomorrow anyway...
So today I'm gonna to live as if there is no tomorrow, and I'm going to forget about yesterday...
Today is the tomorrow that I've planned for yesterday, and nearly all my plans for today did not plan out the way that I thought they would yesterday...
So today I'm forgetting about tomorrow, I will plan for today but not too strenuous...
Today I will stop to smell a rose, to tell a loved one how much I love thee and how much it means to me...
I will stop planning for tomorrow and plan to make today, the best day of my life...

And finally a special dedication...

I keep my paintbrush with me whenever I go, In case I need to cover up so the real me doesn't show... I'm so afraid to show you me; afraid of what you'll do - that you might laugh or say mean things. I'm afraid I might lose you...

I'd like to remove all my paint coats to show you the real, true me; but I want you to try and understand I need you to accept what you see. So if you'll be patience and close your eyes, I'll strip off all my coats real slow - please understand how much it hurts to let the real me show...
Now my coats are stripped off, I feel naked, bare and cold. And if you love me with all that you see, you are my friend pure as gold...

I need to save my paintbrush though, and hold it in my hands. I want to keep it handy in case somebody doesn't understand. If you are truly a friend, please protect me and thanks for loving me true - but please let me keep my paintbrush with me until I love me more...

2010 - a year I will let fate decides...

Yesterday is gone, tomorrow may never come, today is yesterday's tomorrow, what are you going to do with it...

2009-12-19T22:55:00.001+08:00

Featured URL http://www.flickr.com/

Christmas is round the corner.. Normally I do not give much thoughts to it as; firstly, it's not mine to begin with (the religion part) and that there wasn't much people around me then giving the hype on Christmas.. but i guess the "giving bites" has infested me more than normal..

My mind and heart is still in turmoil.. namely my insecurity.. Yes, I should be used to my pride being trampled on and judge every other shitty times.. But where do I put my faith and loyalty into now?? I'm a fierce creature at it and whoever deserves that I will have no qualms doing so.. Sadly, I'm tired shifting it around, I do not know how long more my energy can last..

If I could shut people off, care less, maybe I would be happier.. Indefinitely loneliness will set in but I can definitely said I handle it better than having to think of others' feelings... I'm torn.. Really, I just want peace; I want to save some love for myself to fall back on.. I need it..

Enough of my unforgiving path, I thought of little humour along the way (no offence)

Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in a paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other..

Marriage: It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

Lecture: An art of transmitting information from the notes of a lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water power

Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life

Yawn: The only time when a married men ever get to open their mouth

ETC: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes

Atom Bomb: An invention to bring an end to all inventions

Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead

Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip

Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally into a river

Father: A banker provided by nature

Criminal: A guy no different from the other unless he gets caught

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early

God bless.. Live your day..

Give your best and nature will paved the way for you...

2009-12-05T22:23:00.004+08:00

Featured URL http://www.facebook.com/

I believe
That just because 2 people argue,
it doesn't mean they don't love each other...
And just because they don't argue,
it doesn't mean they do love each other...

I believe
That we don't have to change friends;
if we understand that friends change...

I believe
That no matter how good a friend is,
they are going to hurt you every once in a while,
And you must forgive them for that...

I believe
That true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance,
the same goes for true love...

I believe
That you can do something in an instant,
that will give you heartache for life...

I believe
That it's taking me a long time,
to become the person I want to be...

I believe
That you should always leave loved ones with loving words,
it may be the last time you see them...

I believe
That you can keep going long after you think you can't...

I believe
That we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel...

I believe
That either you control your attitude or it controls you...

I believe
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done,
when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences...

I believe
That money is a lousy way of keeping score

I believe
That my best friend and I can do anything,
or nothing and have the best the time...

I believe
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you are down,
will be the ones to help you get back up..

I believe
That sometimes when I'm angry,
I have the right to be angry,
but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel...

I believe
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you had,
and what you learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you have celebrated...

I believe
That it isn't always enough,
to be forgiven by others,
sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself..

I believe
That no matter how bad your heart is broken,
the world doesn't stop for your grief...

I believe
That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become...

I believe
That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret,
It could change your life forever...

I believe
2 people can look at the exact same thing
and see something totally different...

I believe
That your life can be changed,
in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you...

I believe
That even when you think you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help...

I believe
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being...

I believe
That the people you care about most in life are taken away from you too soon...

I believe
That the happiest people don't necessary have the best of everything,
they just make the most of everything...

It's not what you know but who you know...

2009-11-11T21:27:00.009+08:00

Featured URL http://www.youtube.com/

Sometimes I just wished I had more breathing space.. really, why do people enjoy or even used their precious time to breathe down other people's spine?!? Can't they used their limited brain cells for the better good? Like how to make the workplace a better place - more human, more love and warmth...

If I had a choice in the beginning, I would wipe up the destructicons pronto.. If I was an avatar, they wouldn't have the right to live on this earth much less breathe the same air with those who only meant to do their job well and good intention..

Freak man! This is probably one of the longest period that I had the anger still boiling in me.. It kind of playing my mind right now.. I had every opportunities to last my long awaited peace.. but my fate seems to be like the poor regional countries - facing setbacks from the merciless mother nature batch after batch.. Life is already precious enough, do we have to learn it the hard way?...

I prayed hard that I would still maintain my sanity till my last breath; in the first place how and why did she got the position I have absolutely no idea - that despite I've tried finding reasons for such in predicament.. No sense of passion, service and compassion. What's worth I used to think she was not bad until what a 2 headed-snake she was...

I definitely could not trust the top to do their work and job well.. I just have to avoid getting into pitfalls... Recently to make matter even more gloomy, the person that I used to feel comfortable with suddenly seems like a distance - almost could not sense her sense of belonging among us. She's more than busy with others - period.. I do not know what to think anymore.. Can caring less make me less of a human? Can I live with the consequences?

In decision making there are many insights that unfortunately, humans are capable of it but failed to do so because of their many excuses.. Shitty doesn't it? Giving an analogy "a group of children were playing near a railway tracks. One of the kids played on a disused while the rest - needless to say.. The train is coming and you have every opportunity to save a live or lives by changing the train track. Which would you choose - to save more lives or let the train continue it's path?.. "

Most people would choose to divert the course - sacrificing one live rather than the majority. It seems so rational doesn't it? Rubbish! Why would the lone child who made the right decision in the first place be sacrifice? Besides in the first place, it's a disused track - definitely something the kid would not even imaging that the train will be on it.. Furthermore, since it's disused, the train might even get into an accident causing even more damages... Why should he pay for his live at the expense of his ignorants playmate?

But that is exactly where human prone to err thinking it's for the greater good - the minority is often sacrifice for the interest of the majority no matter how foolish and ignorant the majority are or how far-sighted and knowledgeable the minority are. While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions, we may not realised that hasty decisions may not always be the right one!

Remember that what's right isn't always popular.. and what's popular isn't always right - that's why they put eraser on pencils...

Fate has a funny way to say "we can't run away from him"...

2009-10-17T21:58:00.009+08:00

Featured URL http://www.sony-vaoi.com.sg/

Pictures of imperfection perfect... I miss you...

Making every minute count...

2009-10-13T23:48:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.facebook.com

Life has an usual twists and turns... I would never really expected to be what I am today but yet I am never really thought of it as "in for a surprise" but rather nonchalant about whatever has and had happened.. Don't get me wrong - I do feel about it.. Just that things aren't always lucky and that I have always the "hardship palm lines", I just didn't know how to react at many certain important times..

Questions that ran through my mind - Why we make mistakes? How do we look without seeing, Forget things in seconds and all pretty sure that we are way above average...

There is an excerpt saying an emerging consensus among some psychologists that human decision-making operates on 2 levels - one more rational and one more visceral - and that these 2 constantly trade off, like a car's headlights blinking from high beam to low. Many of our mistakes appear to happen while we are operating in one condition but think we are operating in another..

We may for instance think that our decision to take out a loan was dictated by financial considerations alone, only to learn that we are influenced by the picture of a pretty woman. Or we may vote for a politician after listening to many hours of campaign coverage on TV, only to learn that we formed an opinion about his/ her competence in a blink of an eye..

If this emerging view is accurate, it helps to explain why some types of error-prone behaviours are so hard to eliminate. We think we're being rational when we are visceral and vice-versa. When a mistake does happen, we often end up blaming the wrong cause ("why did I take a loan with such a high interest rate? I must have not done my maths right..."). We don't learn from experience, because we're not sure which experience to learn from..

To make matters worse, studies with children and adults show that a large percentage of people cannot tolerate mistakes. This is particularly true for people who believe that intelligence is fixed and cannot change; in their eyes, a mistake is a reflection of their intelligence, and there is a strong tendency not only to avoid mistakes but, as a consequence, to avoid learning from them..

Pretty much sums up what I thought was truth in it.. The brain maybe willing to pursuit in tenacity; but if the fragile heart could no longer bear the brunt; how should we go about it? Would love suffice?

For one more day...

2009-09-18T15:14:00.004+08:00

Featured URL http://www.sierratradingpost.com/

What would I do if I have just another day ... I would want to forget a lot of things.. Good and bad... Funny isn't it? Most would want to keep the good... I would just settle for peace and simplicity... It has taken me extreme amount of energy trying to stay sane and happy yet I end in a pit less world of suppress, hurt, anger, pain and disappointment... It does eat me...

I used to have a heart - waiting to give all I have... Stupidly enough, I let it be abused and trampled on over and over again.. Should I still seek for peace then?

I've learnt that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow...

I've learnt that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're are gone from your life...

I've learnt that you can tell alot about a person by the way they handle these 3 things - a rainy day, lost luggage and tangled Christmas tree lights...

I've learnt that making a living is not the same as making a life...

I've learnt that life sometimes gives you a second chance...

I've learnt that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw things back...

I've learnt that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision...

Ive learnt that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one...

I've learnt that everyday you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back...

I've learnt that I still have a lot to learn...

I've learnt that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did but people will never forget how you made them feel...

I just got back form a good and peaceful road trip/ break.. I took the time to settle down my churning heart... it was refreshing while it last.. Till I got down to my annual review.. Yes, overall I did good.. I make good of the salary that was given to me.. I keep my word to ensure that whatever I do, I can answer to myself...

Why is it that I can't find solace with their subjective views.. Do I give expectations on myself way to high? Did I overcompensate with the things that was missing in me since child? So I work independently - more correctly, inter-independent.. I work proactively not to gain recognition or fame but to think of the bigger picture - for others...

Instead, alas... for the ultimatum, a difficult woman got it.. how irony.. The more I searched for peace, the more I tried to forget, it just keep haunting me.. I can only pray to stay sane to keep up with my professionalism.. Nothing more will come from me.. she has her own to answer..

Please god.. hear my prayers..

There ain't no such thing as free lunch...

2009-08-10T19:59:00.001+08:00

Featured URL www.mediamasters.com

Finally I managed to set aside some wee tiny bit of time.. Guess what?!?.. It's pretty much a jubilation month for me and I'm very grateful for the change.. It's my birthday month and I just cleared a major setback in my life.. I made a bold decision to try out a new post to keep burning fuel for my passion.. I want to dread on it but I guess I give it a pass for now.. Anyway, here are some happy anecdotes that it's long overdue..

Lessons My Mother Taught Me...

1) My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION ... "You wait! Just wait till
your father comes back!"
2) My Mother taught me about RECEIVING ... "You are going to get it when we
reach home!"
3) My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE ... "Look at me when I'm talking
to you! Why are you staring back at me?!"
4) My Mother taught me about HEALTHY COMPETITION ... "Aunty Mary's son
scored 100 marks for Maths! Why can't you be like him?"
5) My Mother taught me about FINANCIAL PLANNING ... "Make sure you marry a
rich man/woman in future!"
6) My Mother taught me about HISTORY ... "Many many years ago, when I was
your age, I used to...."
7) My Mother taught me to be HOUSE-PROUD ... "Chalet? Stay what chalet? You
got no house to stay is it?!"
8) My Mother taught me about GENETICS ... "You ..you're just like your
father!"
9) My Mother taught me about the WISDOM OF AGE ... "When you get to my age,
you'll understand."
10) My Mother taught me about JUSTICE ... "One day you'll have kids, and I
hope they turn out just like YOU...Then you'll know what it's like!"

AND FINALLY ...

11) My Mother taught me about POWER ... "I am YOUR mother, you better
listen to ME!"

Irony right?!? and here is the next one..

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she loved to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Wal-Mart:

Dear Mrs. Townley,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.Townley are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away. '

5. August 4:Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him, he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least .

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'

Sigh!! I'm very thankful for all the thoughtful crafted birthday messages along with the smacking and bondage (don't get the wrong idea).. Especially the last message coming from her.. All along I thought I was prepared to pretend it was the best decision (to leave and let live) but her presence only made me realise the loneliness (emptiness within) yet unfruitful journey down the road despite my best effort..

Losing definitely hurts, but it hurts even more when you realise you have not done your best...

Every dog will have his day...

2009-07-09T14:41:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.tigerairways.com/

This story that I'm going to share was presented to me from a very warm hearted, caring, hyper friend of mine.. I seriously thought that it was a good reminder for all human kinds to stop and think - have that courage instead of always reacting when things happen. Key word here is "proactive"...

Faith was born on Christmas Eve. He was born with 3 legs - 2 healthy hind legs and 1 abnormal front leg which need to be amputated. He of course could not walk when he was born. Even his mother did not want him.

His 1st owner also did not think that he could survive. Therefore he was thinking of "putting him to sleep". By this time, his present owner, Jude, met him and wanted to take care of him. She was determined to teach him and train this dog to walk by himself.

In the beginning, she put Faith on a surfing board to let him feel the movements. Later she used peanut butter and rewarded him everytime he stands and jump around. Even the other dog at home helped to encourage him to walk. In 6 months, Faith learn to balance on his 2 hind legs and jump around forward. After further training, he now can walk like a human being.

Faith loves to walk around now. No matter where he goes, he just attracts all the people around him. He is now famous on the international scene and has appeared on various newspaper and tv shows. Jude has even given up her teaching post and plan to take him around the world to preach that even without a perfect body, one can have a perfect soul...

In life there are always undesirable things. Perhaps one will feel better if one changes the point of view from direction. Thank you bro...

Life is not a matter of milestones, but of moments...

2009-06-27T00:12:00.002+08:00

Featured URL www.tomhecks.com

For all it's worth, I struggled like hell to find my inner peace... I fought hard to keep my sanity; keeping check on my emotional bank knowing that it will not be justified the way I want... I adamant not to go through the rites of betrayal and dragging my feet to work facing people with masks I never knew I'm capable of... In fact, I might have found myself lost amongst all of them...

I have thought I have compromised against my principles beyond what I shouldn't have in the first place.. I'm still reeling in the shock that I have gone through this six-months... I have always shared with my students the ideal attitudes, positive behaviour, sound minds and judgements - to keep on caring despite the tremendous difficulties, to keep the chin up no matter how your pride was robbed unfairly, to appreciate the days that you went through for it's beautiful moments not the pain nor disappointments however, I couldn't find it fitting into my puzzle at all no matter how I tried to turn, twist or fold...

I hold back in blogging the past few weeks though I am very much able to do it... I tried to find reasons for my doing so and I figured until I have learnt not to hold on to the emotions part of the pain, hurt, humiliations, disappointments, I would not be able to justify my wrong-doings... I wasn't myself from then on, and I had only hope one day, I will be able to remember who I was before.. But till then, I can only look for a rainbow after the rain...

Gentle spring rains water the earth after winter and bring life back into nature. The smells are indescribable. Summer rain storms seem to be more intense. They come quickly and drench the fields. Fall rains are cold and dreary. They seem sad and miserable..

Spring rains are like God's promise of newness after the sameness of winter. His promises are everywhere. The refreshing spring rain stops. Suddenly, beautiful colours shoot across the sky - a painted reminder that the ruin won't last forever. After the Great Flood recorded, God gave assurance that the water wouldn't destroy the earth again and He sealed that promise with a rainbow. Each colour was an added reminder of His goodness and love...

There will be some rain in your life - times when things just wouldn't go as planned. Sickness, failures, misunderstandings will come - some gently like spring rains and some more intense like summer rains. Some may even make you sad and miserable like winter rains...

But they won't last forever. That's a promise! God sealed it with a rainbow...

Your attempt may fail but do not fail to make an attempt...

2009-06-03T21:26:00.002+08:00

Featured URL www.singnet.com

As my friend was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped. confused by the fact that these huge creatures were held captives by only a rope tied to their legs. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime, break away from the ropes they were tied to but for some reason, they did not. My friend saw a trainer nearby and asked why these beautiful. magnificent animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away...

"Well", he said, "when they were very young and much smaller we used the same size rope to tie them at that age, it's enough to hold them. As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe that they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free." My friend was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their bonds but because they believed they couldn't, they were stuck right where they were. The powerful gigantic creature has limited its present abilities by the limitations of its past...

Like the elephants, how many of us go through life holding onto a belief that we cannot do something, simply because we failed at it once before? How many of us refuse to attempt something new and challenging because of our so called MINDSET?!?

ps Choose not to accept the false boundaries and limitations created by the past...

God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way.. Look for God in others..

2009-05-17T21:19:00.007+08:00

Featured URL http://www.sportmenasia.com/

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class, was walking home from school... His name was Kyle.. It looked like he was carrying all of his books... I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday?" he must be really a nerd...

I had quite a weekend planned so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running towards him.. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and cripping so he landed in the dirt...

His glasses went flying and i saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses and that's when I saw tears from his eyes...

As I handed him his glasses, I said "Those guys are jerks! They really should get a life". He looked at me and said "Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude...

I helped him pick up his books and asked him where he lives. As it turned out, he lived near me so I asked him why is it that I have never seen him before. He replied he had gone to a private school.. I would not have hung out with a private school kid before but we talked all the way home and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.

I asked him if he wanted to play a friendly game with my friends and he said yes. We hing out all weekend and the more i get to know Kyle, the more I liked him and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came and there was Kyle with his huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said "Boy! You are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday" he just laughed and handed me some of his load..

Over the next few years, he and I became the best of friends and we went on to our separate college. Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation which I'm glad it wasn't me..

He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked great in glasses. Boy was I jealous.. Today was one of those days and I could also sensed that he was nervour about his speech. So I smacked his back and said "Hey! You be great!" He looked at me with the same smile of gratitude that I saw the first time...

As he cleared his throat, he bagan his speech.. "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you to make it through those tough years.. Your parents, teachers, siblings, maybe coaches.. but most importantly your friends.. I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.. I am going to tell you a story.." I just looked on disbelief as he relates the first time we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleared his locker so that his Mum wouldn't have to. He looked hard and gave me a little smile..

"Thankfully I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable." I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular kid told us about his weakest moment. I saw his parents looking at me and smilling that same attitude... Not until that moment did I realised it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture, you can change a person's life. For better or worse..

I'm in a grieving stage.. Hard to let go.. Felt like screaming but something always pull me back...

There's no need to run in the rain; as you will still be wet...

2009-05-01T22:37:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.msn.com

Found this: To maintain a healthy level of insanity - yup you heard it right!

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with your sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars and see if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Evry time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3weeks, once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

5. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for Marijuana"

6. Skip down the hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.

7. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.

8. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go"

9. Sing along at the opera.

10. 5days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you have a headache.

11. When the money comes out from the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"

12. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling "Run for your lives! They are loose!"

13. Tell your children over the dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go"

14. Pick up a box of condoms at the counter and go over and ask where the fitting room is.

Cheers...

Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain!...

2009-05-01T22:13:00.002+08:00

Featured URL www.tomhecks.com

It was a busy morning, about 8.30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80s arrived to have his stitches removed from his thumb.

He said he was in a hurry, as he had an appointment at 9.00am.

I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him.

I saw him looking at his watch, and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound.

On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound. While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.

The gentleman said no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife.

I inquired her health; he told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.

He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognised him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him, "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?"

He smiled as he patted my hand and said, "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is."

I had to hold back my tears as he left. I had goosebumps on my arms and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life"

True love is neither physical nor romantic.
True love is acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make best of everything they have.

An easy path only reward is that it's easy...

2009-04-19T22:01:00.010+08:00

Featured URL http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzyXcrIpJxY

Pictures to represent irony of serenity and disaster - something I am now..

The more we know the better we forgive, whoever feels deeply, feels for all who live...

2009-04-19T19:46:00.004+08:00

Featured URL http://www.obs.pa.gov.sg/MungoBlobs/335/754/comments%20on%20instructor%20Haizu%20-%20RI%20-%2012%20Jan%2009.pdf

How do we describe pain? or hurt? I am almost speechless at my predicament.. Why do I have to be repeatedly be watched and treated as a criminal suspect? When will it end? How can I ever trust something that was meant to be good in the first place? I don't bode ill and don't find the need to talk bad about other people much less try means and ways to find fault with someone.. I may speak of my own opinion but I don't damned it as my rights or that people should think that way too... Yes I'm indignant and I can be protective/ defensive/ ego about what I care or feel... Do I have to be put up as different?

I'm tired but much importantly, appalled at such underhand behaviours... Certainly not from such reputable position.. Apparently those helming it behind is not of a respectable character... Each person a lesson in life, each encounter became an adventure - the wealthy, the poor, the powerful and the lonely; all were as full of dreams and doubts. Each would have a unique stories to share if only people would hear...

Someone kind asked me whether am I fine or what can appease my bruised heart.. Sadly, I can't find any answers to it... My trust have been misplaced again.. Nothing new except that I should slapped myself for falling into the same traps all over again...

Till death do us apart, in sickness and in health...

2009-03-29T16:27:00.004+08:00

Featured URL www.flickr.com.sg

In relationship...

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said,I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question.This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage.But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew.I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car,and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions... She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce,she said scornfully.My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy.Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset.I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she was not young any more.There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning.This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this.

It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by.Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.Suddenly it hit me...she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad,it's time to carry mum out.To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly.I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally.I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...

I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her,"Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore."She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever?She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote,I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run upstairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. I know how her heart could not bear to hear my last words now. I still carried her, my last one...this time with my wretched heart.

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank, what so ever. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So the find time..

Your disabilities is your opportunities...

2009-02-26T23:35:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://mysafra.safra.sg

Just had my recent review.. Total opposite of what I had last time.. Not a single affirmation do I get recognition from... All I heard was anything but... I'm tired of defending, tired of explaining... People can create whatever controversy they want... I just wished they mind their own business more..

How much I ached inside you probably can't imagine... My trust is broken, do not expect any warmth from me.. I will just shield you even further.. I'm going to do what I am expected.. Not going to share my views or thoughts...

I couldn't believe my ears the amount of "constructive feedback" that I got from.. It was nothing mentioned of the good merits that I have done.. Felt like the black sheep... Under appreciated hardly describe the feeling that I have.. Initially I had the drive to pursue beyond my means, contributing whatever I could sum up... Now...

I leave it at the hands of God.. I know my awareness.. How my students rave about me in their blogs.. It's through that I found solace after a hard day work... Of course, they are people worth keeping while the rest are basically piece of shit.. Does it means I have to sacrifice my needs??

Where was the emotional safety that we talked about? Is our philosophy just about getting the students to discover by themselves despite getting no where? Guidance are also a form of sharing isn't it? I'm dictated again by what I can do and can't do.. It's always the way...

Just as I thought it might just get more worse, I saw a sign - a double arc rainbow across two islands.. It was mesmerising and most importantly, peaceful... Exactly what I need..

How you feel about you is in your hands...

2009-02-22T22:02:00.015+08:00

Featured URL http://www.hsbc.com.sg/

Oddly enough, I have never take a moment to consider what I would like my future to be nowadays.. I guessed it's the curse that whenever and whatever I want to have, it always slipped past my hands like grains of sand no matter how hard or loose I hold them.. Not sure how I managed to hold up all this while but I guess, the Almighty had a unique way of saying he has better plans for me.. Frustrated as I am over my inability to control, I got to learn how to start all over again...

Breakout, Extreme dance comedy was one of the show that intrigued me to start doing what was not norm. Indeed it was truly an amazing performances by the group of very talented breakdancers from Korea. The music to the choreography to the spectacular energy that was prominently displayed till the end... I wished I can do my own breakout - away from being my own prisoner of misfortune... Ironically, the characters died eventually in the show after much hassle and going through pain, hunger and loneliness. That would exactly described what will happened to me if I plan my own escape to get my way... At least, the characters get to experienced a moment of bliss and happiness which they will never ever probably going to have it if they just stayed in their cell...

I'm in dilemma...

So coincidentally, I've spent one Sunday channel surfing when I realised they are showcasing

Korean drama again the whole afternoon.. Witch Yoo Hee and Be Strong Geum Soon.. Both are comedy based on love tragedy.. I had a good enjoyable time but looking back, am I laughing at their misfortune in falling in love or am I just laughing what I went through.. I was mesmerized by their persistent in getting what they want even though it was a far fetch and interesting enough, nature has a way to mix them up and caused misery yet the lead characters hold their head high up in pride regardless... Can I ever do that?? Didn't think it's even possible for a second..

He who can supress a moment's of anger may prevent a day of sorrow...

2009-02-22T10:29:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.limewire.com

Can I Borrow $25?

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.

SON: 'Daddy, may I ask you a question?'
DAD: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the man.
SON: 'Daddy, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the man said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'If you must know, I make $50 an hour.'
SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: 'Daddy, may I please borrow $25?'

The father was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish.I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities.'

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door. The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money? After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down , and started to think: Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often.

The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door. 'Are you asleep, son?' He asked. 'No daddy, I'm awake,' replied the boy. 'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the man. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $25 you asked for.' The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you daddy!' he yelled. Then,reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills. The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father. 'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the father grumbled. 'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied. 'Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.'

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness. It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that $50worth of your time with someone you love. If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours. But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives...

"Men are born to succeed - not to fail"

2009-01-29T23:53:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.nofailures.com/managefailures.htm

HOW TO MANAGE FAILURES SUCCESSFULLY
25 Laws and my cynical contributions..

"Nobody succeeds in a big way except by risking failure." - William Feather

1. Smile at failure. Failure only exists temporarily. Anticipate success will return.
Whether I smile or resist, it still came to me.. Fate sure has a funny way..

2. Believe that there are no failures; we merely postpone our success. There are no failures in life, only delays. Failures are stepping stones, not stumbling blocks, to success. Unless there are failures, how can there be success?
True.. but we can still have fruitful success and learnt to get it better right...

3. Failure can be reversed into success.
Success can be driven to rewards and more motivation...

4. Failure is a process. It is a series of events leading to the failure that fails.
Too much of it can always kill a person within..

5. It takes a lot of courage to fail.
Only if you have experienced success before..

6. Failing challenges us to greater heights.
Who says meaningful success can't?

7. It is a privilege to taste failure. Not everyone has the experience of a particular failure.
Not everyone too can experience a sweet success of a kind..

8. Failure is not final.
Success is a continuity to pursue further..

9. Accept the realities of failure. It strikes at everybody.
Sure but isn't it less of a heartbreaking to accept success even at small amount?

10. Do not brand ourselves as failures.
Nobody ever want.. They never planned for it..

11. Regard failure as an isolated case. We have not failed; it is the work we have done that has failed. We must separate ourselves from failure. While we dislike our failure, we still love ourselves dearly.
We should be entitled to love both success and ourselves together as a set too..

12. Permit ourselves to fail.
Should we in the first place.. isn't it compromising?

13. Do not regard failing as a stigma.
Society does it not our choice to begin with isn't it?

14. Failure is not the opposite of success. It is the step prior to achieving success.
Which I'm very sure we can make do without it if we can..

15. Any work we do has inevitably two results - failure or success. It is akin to tossing a coin in the air - the result is either a head or a tail when it lands on the ground. Sometimes, it happens that failure results. We did not choose failure.
Yeah.. but it choose us instead every other time..

16. Failure is a learning process. We learn failure in the school of hard knocks, just like we learn trigonometry in school. Regard failing as an education process.
Success too can be a mitigating process in education to pursue better..

17. Since failure is a learning process, enjoy failure! Failure can only be appreciated and enjoyed in the University of Life.
Which success also deserved such recognition...

18. Failure is a resource from which we can draw invaluable experiences.
And who says we can't find it in success..

19. Failure creates other opportunities.
Success not just create but opens doors of opportunities instead..

20. Focus on managing 20% of crucial failures. It contributes to 80% of the results.
Isn't that how we want to achieve success.. how irony..

21. Failure is not that important. It is the response we make to the failure that is important.
Success is the building blocks to future opportunities..

22. Read biographies of successful men and their failure. Study how it traumatized and spurs them on to greater heights. Model them.
Yup, that's why they are the great one remember??

23. Pamper yourself with a good book, holiday, meal, movie or simply laze around and smell the roses.
With success, it's definitely 100% more appealing..

24. Plan and strategies what is the next course of our action.
Success don't have a day off either..

25. Finally, remember success is managing failure.
Remember, success should be equally granted to us esp those who got too many failures at hand to handle..

When we are successful, we will look back at our failures with a grin. How badly we took it when we could have enjoyed and savored them. really??

"It's okae to miss the bed on the first jump.."

2009-01-29T23:26:00.002+08:00

Featured URL www.isivon.com

6 Corporate Lessons to keep you safe in an organization... Have you pick them up??? Not sure if it's that handy though.. no pun intended..

Corporate Lesson 1
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel that you have on" After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her 800 dollars and leaves. Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks from the shower, "Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbour," she replies. "Great!" the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"

Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk in time with your stakeholders, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

Corporate Lesson 2
A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road, he stopped and offered her a lift, which she accepted. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely leg. The priest had a look and nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun looked at him and immediately said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest was flustered and apologized profusely. He forced himself to remove his hand. Changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" Once again the priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the nun got out gave him a meaningful glance and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up Psalm 129. It Said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story: Always be well informed in your job, or you might miss a great opportunity.

Corporate Lesson 3
A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one." "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an Endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Corporate Lesson 4
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Corporate Lesson 5
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Corporate Lesson 6
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and ca! me to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story: 1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy. 2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. 3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Well, I leave the lessons learnt in your thoughts.. sigh..

"Good Life starts only when you stop wanting a better One"

2009-01-29T23:17:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.singnet.com.sg

TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is." Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB". ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you." We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves. If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television." There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins. ----------

NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character." It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations.. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party. A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered,"You should appreciate that you married me. Other wise, he will be the millionaire and not you." Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed. ---------------------------------------------------------------

PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey? "Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey. Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented , "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman." The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you." Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river. You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future. Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear.. ------------------------------------------------------

BE PATIENT
This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to
admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide. Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever. ..

In summary, people wake up!!

The day you were born...

2009-01-29T22:39:00.005+08:00

Featured URL www.umediacorptv.com/gorgeous

Found this when I rummaged through my cyber trash.. Wanted my mind to be off from wandering.. Wondering any of the part is true...

VIRGO - The One that Waits
Dominant in relationships... Someone loves them right now... Always wants the last word... Caring... Smart... Loud.... Loyal... Easy to talk to... Everything you ever wanted.... Easy to please... The one and only...

SCORPIO - The Addict
EXTREMELY adorable.... Intelligent.... Loves to joke.... Very good sense of humor.... Energetic... Predict future... GREAT kisser.... Always get what they want.... Attractive... Easy going.... Loves being in long relationships.... Talkative... Romantic... Caring....

LIBRA - The Lame One
Nice to everyone they meet... Their Love is one of a kind... Silly, fun and sweet... Have own unique appeal... Most caring person you will ever meet! however not the kind of person you wanna mess with... u might end up crying...

ARIES - The Liar
Outgoing.... Lovable.... Spontaneous.... Not one to mess with.... Funny.... Excellent kisser ... EXTREMELY adorable.... Loves relationships... Addictive.... Loud....

AQUARIUS - Does It In The Water
Trustworthy.... Attractive.... Great kisser.... One of a kind.... Loves being in long-term relationships... Extremely energetic.... Unpredictable.... Will exceed your expectations.... Not a Fighter but will Knock your lights out...

GEMINI - Irresistible
Nice.... Love is one of a kind.... Great listeners.. Very good in the you know where... Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you out... Trustworthy.... Always happy.... Loud.... Talkative.... Outgoing... VERY FORGIVING.... Loves to make out... Has a beautiful smile... Generous.... Strong...

LEO - The Lion
Great talker.... Attractive and passionate.... Laid back... Knows how to have fun... Is really good at almost anything... Great kisser... Unpredictable... Outgoing.... Down to earth... Addictive.... Attractive.... Loud... Loves being in long relationships....Talkative.... Not one to mess with.... Rare to find... Good when found....

CANCER - The Cutie
MOST AMAZING KISSER... Very high appeal... Love is one of a kind... Very romantic... Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative... Extremely random and proud of it.... Freak... Spontaneous.... Great telling stories.... Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it....

PISCES - The Partner for Life
Caring and kind.... Smart.... Center of attention... High appeal... Has the last word... Good to find, hard to keep... Fun to be around... Extremely weird but in a good way.... Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful... Always gets what he or she wants... Loves to joke... Very popular... Silly, fun and sweet...

CAPRICORN - The Passionate Lover
Love to bust.... Nice... Sassy... Intelligent... Sexy.... Predict future... Irresistible... Loves being in long relationships... Great talker.... Always gets what he or she wants... Cool.... Loves to own Gemini's in sports... Extremely fun.... Loves to joke.... Smart....

TAURUS - The Tramp
Aggressive... Loves being in long relationships... Likes to give a good fight for what they want... Extremely outgoing... Loves to help people in times of need... Good kisser... Good personality... Stubborn... A caring person... One of a kind... Not one to mess with... Are the most attractive people on earth!

SAGITTARIUS - The Promiscuous One
Spontaneous... High appeal... Rare to find... Great when found... Loves being in long relationships... So much love to give... Not one to mess with... Very pretty... Very romantic.... Nice to everyone they meet... Their Love is one of a kind... Silly, fun and sweet... Have own unique appeal... Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in the you know where..!!! Not the kind of person you wanna mess with- you might end up crying...

*Note the author who wrote the above must be anything except LEO.. (",)

When the world says give up, hopes whispers to try another time...

2009-01-18T21:34:00.007+08:00

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I wish, I wish, I wish... For a length of time, I have been nothing short but spats of ill-luck.. I had enough.. As it is my heart is already going through a great deal of pain and yet it doesn't stop there... I had rendered myself to fate now.. Didn't think I will recover for no one to pick up the broken pieces with me...

Where matters of the heart, I am glad you have move on, at least faster than me... The memories that were shared, dutifully bring both agony and pleasantness at the same time that I felt anytime I would go crazy or died from suffocation.. I knew my soul is shattered and no amount of healing will help.. I'm determined more than ever to lead my life a day at a time and no longer could trust to bring myself closer to my future hopes...

Where my mind wished to seek peace and calm, well, things just refused to let me have an easier time.. Nowadays, it seems my path is full of shadows... In the process, I've suffered in silent humiliation... My mind getting sceptical... My limit getting nearer..

I'm going the grasp the only hope that is left for me... Keeping silence will keep me moving.. Would never let anyone second guess my mind anymore.. Nor side-track me.. No matter, I'm going to hold my head up.. This simple wish is mine to cast, a magic spell to make it last, I close my eyes a little shiver, this wish for me now please deliver..

Losing hurts.. but it hurts even more when you realise that...

2009-01-01T00:56:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.mediamasters.com.sg/

I found myself and ran away... But something pulled me back.. Voice of reason I forgot I had.. All I know is you're not here to say, what you always used to say but it's lost in the sky tonight... So I won't give up and I won't break down sooner than it seems life turns around... And I will be strong even if it all goes wrong in my face... When I'm standing here in the dark I'll still believe Someone's (faith) watching over me...

Seen the ray of light shining on my destiny... And I wont be afraid to follow everywhere it's taking me... All I know is yesterday is gone and right now I belong to this moment to my dreams... It doesn't matter what people say and it doesn't matter how long it takes... Believe in yourself and you're fine and only matters how true you are... So be true to yourself and follow your heart... Someone's (faith) watching over me

However much beauty and magic you have enjoyed so until now; you have chosen to have more from the time of my timely demised... Sadly but true...

Ignorance gives one a large range of probabilities...

2008-12-20T22:18:00.007+08:00

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The emptiness in me just grew and grew.. When will it stop, I haven't had a clue... I don't know exactly how to deal with it or how to expressed it out.. My heart bleeds, my head hurt and my stomach just felt as though someone had just punched me in, which I gladly take it in exchange for all of that.. The monster that dwells in me is now rampaging taken over my heart.. I can't trust me anymore.. I felt sad, pain and lost..

On top of it, my grandpa passed away during my reservist.. didn't get to see him for the last time.. didn't get to even take part in his funeral.. a guilt that will stay with me for long time.. I was outfield, my hp was flat, I could only retrieved the message after everything is done.. Mom told me dad is trying to stay strong.. I don't know how I would react if it happens to me..

I had a dream before when my loved ones left me.. I knew then it be a very difficult time for me to live without them.. I can't take lost.. I knew I cried in my sleep.. It felt so real.. Days passed and the quietness that I felt could have never been colder.. I buried myself in work, hoping to ease me so end of the day, only exhaustion and lethargic took over...

This time round, this reservist with the familiar faces was more than a touching period for me.. I felt responsible over them.. Felt the need to protect them.. The parting just reminded me of my own loss.. Whatever I used to believe seems to be deluding me.. for how long, I don't have the slightest answer...

Do you know what am I saying?!? "you don't understand me"...

2008-11-23T20:02:00.002+08:00

Featured URL www.citibank.com.sg

Will I ever attain peace within me? I still felt that people around me does not understand me at all... I'm always treated like "juveniles" and given instructions on what and how to do... There's something boiling in me just waiting to rebel...

Simply said when nobody bothers to understand, this could potentially develop anger within oneself... which is another reason why people rebel... Why couldn't people learn to respect? Does it mean that just because we are close and chummy, they don't have to feel the sense of worth for the other person??

Understand that respecting is not easy.. People have said that respect has to be earned... I just hope people would consider playing this game called "consider the consequences"... If we could just do that for the situation when a person is no longer around, we will realise the importance of that person and how much they meant to us...

Understand that I work highly driven for a purpose... understand that what I do are for people's benefit... There are always some reasons for my demanding ways.. I may have gone through life more and will probably know that learning are important for today's society... Stop kidding with ourselves... Show it now...

If you keep saying you are busy, then you never be free... If you keep saying you have no time, then you never will have time..

2008-11-02T14:46:00.007+08:00

Featured URL http://www.dollarstore-hack.blogspot.com/

This week isn't a week that I'm going to be proud of.. wasn't happy.. wasn't purposeful.. I guessed I am not part of the fortunate ones to be able to chase my happiness and kept it with me.. It has always been short-lived.. I should know with the number of times I was disappointed and saw it slipping away from my fingers.. Interestingly, I held it tight as well as loose, still didn't work out for me either way.. Why can't people keep their opinionated opinions to themselves?? What's wrong with them?? Do they always wants to have the last say?? Just stop giving the reasons to yourself.. Just keep your lips on! There are time and place for it.. Doesn't mean I kept quiet equates me bowing down to your reasoning.. You look silly if you believe it...

I have my ways and I know what I need to work towards to.. You don't need to teach me especially when you are not much more intelligent or experience than me.. Crap! If you think I'm arrogant then so be it! Just like you, I don't need you to accept my reasoning; listen and absorb my thought process not challenge and cause each other to feel they are limited and are not on par.. Be open my foot! By popular demands and by my standards, open would mean you listen, accept and think about it the least. Know when you need to try it out first before conclusively remark that yours is better...

Especially those of you who I hold in high regards; sometimes without me saying, I need your support not your bantering nor your opinions... Understand that I don't work best with limitations and whatever restrain you set onto me, I will resist.. I'm not blocking your route to success, don't block mine! I agree I will get over it.. but it's not going to help you when you need me one day for I won't be trap by you people again.. No! I had enough in fact too much of it..

For the one that hold dear to my heart, I just hope that you see the light one day.. No one can determine about the future.. I can make grand plans but if you don't want to see it in my views I've got nothing to say.. You know, your remark "just like good friend" doesn't goes down well with me.. I guess it's another trauma that will stick to me on top of many others.. I don't think I live long enough to get over it.. I probably can see how I depart from this world.. Living and be happy for others, and sadly none for me... To those who wants to help a helping hand, stop asking questions that undermine me or by abilities.. I don't need it and neither you need to.. Correct yourselves first before you think you can lord over me..

Live life... Forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love whole-heartedly, laugh at things that you won't regret...

2008-10-25T10:49:00.002+08:00

Featured URL www.weplaypaintball.com

Over-drive, over-shot, over-exhausted... Not that I'm complaining but really, I guess it's my way to deal with my ever fluctuating inconsistent feelings.. Talked about emotional safety but hardly they cared about what they said to me.. I'm well aware at how I fare deep inside and I know where I stand in taking constructive feedbacks.. You know what, I'm over with the explaining.. If I can see their point of view and respected that, I don't see why they can't do vice versa.. It's their loss, I just going to keep my thoughts to a minimum.. Called me cynical but truth is that not many can handle my word, my thoughts...

Be it how negative people perceived me, I just keep faith.. My conscious is clear, my intention is good.. No malice, no betrayal.. People who take that effort to hear me deeper will receive more from me.. I have done my part to listen and work with them whether or not they think I did.. I had enough doing.. I'm not god - there is a limit eventually but I'm not going to give in easily..

Saturday last week, revealed that i'm a sustainable with high purpose.. People thought that I'm an affirmation.. Guess what, all along I'm just mysterious to you guys.. I won't be broken easily.. I'm not going to make the same mistake all over again.. I'm not letting it.. If it's a lifelong battle that I have to live with, it's my destiny and I will face it with high regards for myself..

Everything we do matters... appreciate what we've already got...

2008-09-29T17:32:00.011+08:00

Featured URL http://sg.news.yahoo.com/afp/20080926/tts-us-health-cancer-telephone-972e412.html

Wise quotes that I found... I'm so agreeing with it.. read on!

You don't find happiness in the absence of problems... You'll find it in spite of your problems...

2008-09-29T17:01:00.003+08:00

Featured URL http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qghKeGQckKw

You don't wait for life to get easier... You make the choice to be happy first..

I remembered waiting for my life to get easier. I thought, "When I have less problems, I'll be happy!" Then I noticed something fascinating. The happiest people I knew had more problems than I did!

Maybe you have noticed the same thing - that people who seem to get the most out of their life have often had it tough. They have lost loved ones, or that they've gone broke or even suffered serious illness - and most likely they still have big problems!

But they are happy because at some point of their life they decided "happy" is the only way to live. Happiness doesn't just happen to you, like some "accident". It is something you choose...

Recently and not-so, I had a dear friend who ran into bad spat of darkness.. He seemed to be in so much heartache - a pain as equivalent as life force riping itself off something which I had felt it before many times and still do.. All he could ever think of how he can make life easier and happier for his better half and not a single advice from me or words that would make him save some for himself... I could only agree with him in silence and yet as much I want to protest. I realised I couldn't disagree... Part of me felt it's only natural that we do anything to protect what we value so much.. I had tried very loosely appeared nonchalant everytime the things that I should deserved just slip off my fingers - maybe that's how I define happiness in letting go despite my heavy heart and feeling dead empty inside...

If you wake up saying, "I hope I have a good day, then I'll be happy", you never be...

"Never explain anything to anyone; cause the person who likes you don't need it and the person who dislikes you won't believe it..."

2008-09-14T22:33:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.isivon.com

Somehow, the quote seems to be on the right chord with my heart... There's more truth to it than just plain hypothesis.. Haven't we had enough cold wars?? My heart sank every time we are in such hiatus.. It's painful, miserable and hauntingly depressed.. Sometimes I wonder whether do you ever spare a thought about how I feel, do you ever truly accept the weakness I am and do you ever make an effort every single time we spent together being happy and not full of misery... Do not mistaken as I having second thoughts or that I'm complaining.. I searched and looked hard where did we go wrong every time we are stuck.. Did I do anything wrong behind your back?? Did I not do enough to squeeze time to spent it with you?? What else is lacking in me??

Of lately, you seems more frustrated being with me.. Is it too difficult and painful to be with me?? I wasn't being impatient with you.. I just do not wish to quarrel with you.. I have enough.. really.. All I looked forward was your smile and that I can feel you, and having you trusting me.. Is it too much to ask?? You apologised for not being good enough.. Do you think it's what I want to hear.. You told me time and time that I did not consider your feelings but vice versa, how did you consider my feelings? Since day 1 you knew I never will openly expressed out my thoughts and feelings, at least not when I am trying to understand the emotions that is building in me and my mind running amok thinking about how I can hurt you less...

I really am lost for words as to what you want me to do.. If you do not want me to pick up any calls or sms when I'm with you, then I don't.. If you expect me to returned your calls every time when you do, then I make it a point.. When will your heart be at peace?? When will you ever stop doubting me, my faith, my love?? It's okay if you think it's too much a hassle to understand me without asking why or without feeling vexed.. I'm suggesting you don't need to.. As long I can is more than enough.. The greatest gift of love is to be with the person you love most without expecting anything in return and sometimes even if it means letting go...

Thoughts are invisible clouds that go out and gather results for us... They determine what we reap...

2008-08-03T19:07:00.005+08:00

http://ways-to-annoy-a-talking-person.funnypart.com/

Of all the months in the calendar, why do I have to feel especially empty this month?? It's my special day but i can't help feeling so different inside.. I recognised it as not happy but for what reasons do I have?? I can't compare myself explicitly with the rest who are not so fortunate like me.. Is it because I have too much expectations of life? Pain causes us to contemplate: to change direction. It prompts us to look at things differently...

But with emotional pain as well as physical pain, if we keep doing something stupid we keep getting hurt. We might say, "well it shouldn't hurt, I don't want it to hurt," but it will still hurt... badly... Some people manage to hurt over something twenty four hours a day, three hundred and sixty five days a year. They never it realised it is time to take their hand off the stove... But I'm confused as to whether am I doing it or the surrounding is pressing me to it..

Seriously, no matter where I turn, I will still be unhappy.. I can't be me.. Wise man said if you want to be happy, be happy!.. Sadly... Can't we ever be more understanding, less hatred, more tolerance and less biased??

You are part of the universe, no less than the stars and trees, and you have the right to be here... and whether it is clear to you or not...

2008-07-11T00:46:00.003+08:00

Featured URL www.citibank.com.sg

a few thoughts on love... how does one do justice to love?? have you ever wondered why we love babies so much? we like babies because they are so open and vulnerable. as they open their arms and look into our eyes, they say to us "love me, i need you and i can't make it all alone"...

as we grow older, many of us come to believe that we have to fake self-sufficiency. we pretend. we say "i'm all right, i'm okae, i'm tough, i can handle it" while inside we may be frightened, lonely and craving for someone to listen...

there is a myth around that says "you had better not admit that you are vulnerable or lonely, or you will look weak". it also says "don't be honest about how you really feel, or someone will sink the boot in". the myth is back to front. it is only when we fake it and pretend that we are ok, that we get into trouble...

it is ironic that those of us who are the most desperate for affection, do the most pretending that we don;t need it. when we are really soft and lonely insode, we then have to do an extra good job of letting the world know that everything is fine..

love is not ooey gooey. love is strength and commitment.. to love some can mean telling them what they don't want to hear..

love is courage, and it takes alot more courage to say "i'm scared", or "i love you", than it does to clout someone around the ears. love is respect, for ourselves and others. it is all about allowing people to be where they are and loving them anyway. the moment we say, you do this and then i will love you, that isn't love - it is manipulation...

love is about looking for the good in people, and if we can do that, and do it consistently, then our own happiness is guaranteed. as our life is a reflection of ourselves, the more love and beauty that we perceive, the more we are growing and the more we are becoming, and so for all of us, love is everything...

No person ever became great or good except through many and great mistakes...

2008-05-26T00:46:00.003+08:00

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Obvious reasons, we might even conclude that the bigger the mistake, the greater the gain. Anything's possible isn't it? Sometimes after a disaster we spend tons of effort trying to hide our mistake or shift the blame. If we'd face it squarely and learn from it, we could get on with things and move ahead. By staying in the defensive mode, we lose the opportunity to get better...

But most of us who have been burned once or twice, or made some colossal error, tend to get petty you say. I said, we had stop taking chance. We pull ourselves back into a shell, or we analyse things to death, just to be safe. Just to make sure we don't make the same mistake twice. I'm all for learning from mistakes, but we have to keep trying. to be paralyzed from fear of failure is infinitely more tragic than failing.

So things rarely turn out the way we'd hoped. Sometimes they fail completely. This is just a way to show us that we need to fine tune our approach. Even when we play a guitar for a short time it has to be tuned. By failing once in a while, we can learn how to do it better. If we spend our lives avoiding mistakes, we are missing our chance to become great!

To those who have fail before, here's something to cheer about... A reminder that we do have the strengths to carry out and pursuit our dreams... Below, is an Italian horoscope and you can find a lot about yourself just by searching your own identity in the Italian way. What you have to do is to find your group with the help of your date of birth.

Date of Birth Group

01,06,11,16,21,26,31 A1
02,07,12,17,22,27 B2
03,08,13,18,23,28 C3
04,09,14,19,24,29 D4
05,10,15,20,25,30 E5

Group A1 You consider love as the most beautiful thing and you love to fall in love, but a number of your group members think that the person they love is not sincere with them. You love to be with your friends and you are always found to be a dutiful friend. You can hardly control your patients, which is a very big drawback of your nature. The person who is ruling your mind & heart these days is perfect for you.

Group B2 Your dreams and ambitions are much important for you and you can do everything to fulfill your dreams. Love is much valuable in your life but you always search for someone perfect. You hardly trust someone. Your friends are really important for you but normally you hide a lot from them. You are a deep thinker you always study the negative view as well as positive. You can lead a happy life with a person for whom you care a lot these days.

Group C3 You always prefer mantel decisions more then emotional ones due to this you don't have a limited number of friends. You consider life a very beautiful gift and you love to enjoy its colors. There are a number of peoples who are your ideals and you loved to spend a big part of your time with them. You are found to be a very sincere lover.. You have a perfect control on your emotions but sometimes your decisions really effect your beloveds. The person who has just appeared in your mind is your real and special friend.

Group D4 Your always have goals to achieve and you can do everything to fulfill the dreams of those who loves you. You have a sketch of an ideal in your mind and you always search for that personality. Your friends means a lot to you and you can do everything for the sake of your friend, you a normally found to be an emotional personality. You have a very less control on your patients and due to this sometimes you over react.

Group E5 You are found to be a person who loves to love. You prefer emotional decision more then mantel decisions. You consider life just to enjoy; you are the one who is perfect to call FLURTIES. You love to increase the list of your friends and beloved. You have a number of dreams but you never work hard to make your dreams come true which is the biggest drawback in your nature you take everything much lightly.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy...

2008-05-19T18:12:00.007+08:00

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Only if we know that creativity is allowing ourselves to make mistakes.. Art is knowing which ones to keep... Sometimes I wish I lost hope just like everyone else... Forget about trying, forget about understanding.. If peeps are not open and not welcoming ideas as they should then it's a wasted breath.. So I look around hard to find inspirations.. and I decided to research through my old study topics about horoscope hoping I find solace in the stubborn peeps around me..

Be known it's a theory that needs the right practical moments to make the following statements to be true.. Otherwise enjoy reading it and expand your knowledge simultaneously..

---------------JANUARY BABY--------------------

pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive. Down-to-Earth. Stubborn..

----------FEBRUARY BABY --------------------

Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. sexiest out of everyone. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Horny. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.

-----------------MARCH BABY --------------------

Attractive personality. sexy. Affectionate Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Great kisser. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others.

------------------APRIL BABY -------------------

Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and traveling. Systematic. hot but has brains.

-----------------MAY BABY -----------------

Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited.

------------JUNE BABY -------------

You've got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have an a very attractive partner. a wicked hottie. It is also more than likely that you have a massive record collection. You have a great choice in films, and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you've got the looks for it!!!

----------------JULY BABY --------------

Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. snazzy at times. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.

------------AUGUST BABY ---------------

outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. kind hearted. self confident. loud and boisterous. easy to get along with and talk to. has an "every thing's peachy" attitude. likes talking and singing. loves music. daydreamer. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. loves to be loved. hates studying. in need of "that someone". longs for freedom. rebellious when withheld or restricted. lives by "no pain no gain" caring. always a suspect. playful. mysterious. charming or beautiful to everyone. stubborn. curious. independent. strong willed. a fighter.

------------SEPTEMBER BABY ---------------

Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand.

---------------OCTOBER BABY -------------------

Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all.

---------------NOVEMBER BABY --------------------

Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, the greatest men are born in this month. If you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind.

---------------DECEMBER BABY ---------------

good-looking person possible. Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Has that someone always on his/her mind. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Abiding. Able to show character. one guy/girl kind of person. Loveable. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. loves music. pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive.

So there you goes.. and you know what?!? There are more good stuffs to where it comes from.. Here's a sneak preview.. hehe...

"Leo's floored by Virgo's exceptional femininity. She recognizes a talent worth championing: He might become her mission. They'll enjoy an even-keel existence. In bed, she's the seductive schoolcharm; he's her dominant pupil" - based on sextrology by starsky+cox

The wisest mind has something yet to learn...

2008-05-11T21:02:00.005+08:00

Featured URL http://www.teachmeteamwork.com/

Unfortunately teen bodybuilding is not as easy as it looks and can result in injury, bad habits and frustration if stated with out structure and progression.
So the question is, how is teen bodybuilding done right? Should teen bodybuilders read the latest bodybuilding magazines? Learn from their friends or a professional? Train every day or every other day? Rely on supplements? Start when they are done growing or earlier? Focus on endurance training heavy lifting? Teen bodybuilding has dozens of questions and many different opinions on each. Here is my top 10 tips to successful teen bodybuilding in no particular order:

1. Avoid Steroids
Duh! This might sound obvious and if you have not been offered steroids yet, make your stand now and be prepared to say 'no' when you get backed into a corner. Your body is flowing with more natural hormones than any steroid could replace. Don't screw up your natural hormonal levels at such a young age. Even though all your friends might laugh at you for not conforming to the pressure of using illegal drugs, be a real man and train drug free. In the end your friends will respect you more for staying away from the dark side.

2. Focus On Clean Eating
Old habits die hard. Believe it or not, the nutrition habits you are creating today will affect you all the way into your adult years. As a young teen bodybuilder, you have an opportunity to create good habits at an early age. Focus on eating clean carbohyrdates like whole wheat breads, oatmeal, brown rice, potatoes, fruits and veggies. Focusing on eating a variety of clean proteins like tuna, chicken, fish, cottage cheese and protein shakes. Balance out your meals with clean fats like olive oil, fish oil, natural peanut butter and nuts. Take pride in the fact that you even know what clean eating is. Look at this as an opportunity to be an example to your friends to be walking statue of health! I promise you that you will have a few friends who admire your physique and ask you for advice!

3. Avoid One Body Part Workouts And Focus On A Full Body Workout
A full body workout? But all my friends are training chest tonight. And tomorrow they are training back. And on Wednesday they are training arms. But if you have the courage, you are not going to follow the herd and trust me. You are too young to be splitting up your muscles groups into only one body part a day. Unless you are pursuing a career in competitive bodybuilding, one-body part splits are an excellent way to over train at a young age. Look at it this way. Do you only eat once per week? Do you only take supplements once per week? Do you only sleep once per week? Do you only study once per week? Than why would you train your muscle groups only once per week? It does not make sense. Full body workouts will allow you to hit all your major muscle groups three times in the week, without overtraining, instead of only one time.

4. Emphasize Your Conditioning
Teen bodybuilding can actually become something that appear to be a lazy man's sport. Next time you walk into the weight room, count how many people are actually doing something. Seriously, I guarantee you will see more people standing around and talking, adjusting weights and staring in the mirror. Not many people are actually hustling from one exercise to another or even sweating. That's another reason to avoid one body-part bodybuilding style workouts. They don't emphasize your fitness or cardiovascular system. Your weight training program should be incorporating more than just weights. Balance out your sessions with some skipping, stair climbing, hard running, supersets, and really short rest periods. If you don't feel like you are going to throw up at the end of your weight training sessions, I have to question your workout intensity.

5. Stick to Basic Supplements
Your a teenager and should be saving your money for college and your first car. Don't get scammed by over hyped supplement ads that promise the world. Follow the saying, 'If it looks too good to be true, than most likely it is!” All you need to budget for now is a high quality multi-vitamin which you should take for life as well as a high quality protein powder in your arsenal and a regular omega-3 fish oil cap. Between these three supplements you are more than covered. Don't worry about creatine, glutamine, fat burners, testosterone boosters or even NO2 products. The first three to four years of your lifting should be done with just the basic supplements.

6. Learn Proper Technique First
How well do you think you would golf without supervision? How well do you think you will skate without coaching? How well do you think you will play piano without lessons? How much muscle do you think you will build without proper lifting technique? Not much!
I hope you are humble enough to swallow your pride and accept the fact that your first step should be getting professional coaching from a reputable fitness trainer. I know many of your friends will not even consider this and you will be told, 'just learn it yourself,' or 'watch others.' Can you imagine a medical surgeon or dentist who took this approach? Yikes!
Think about it. You are going to be lifting weights the rest of your life. Is spending a few hundred or even a few thousand dollars, on a professional fitness trainer, not going to pay you back over and over (for the rest of your life) if you do things correctly right from the start? Definitely! If you start lifting weights incorrectly, get ready to spend the money you saved on a coach for a rehab therapists next vacation! If you don't get injured now, most likely it will be in the next few years.

7. Stretch Just As Much As You Lift
Stretching is the most under rated physical quality which is unfortunate because shortened muscles perform weaker and slower and have a higher incidence of injury. Stretching is the only physical quality which more is better. Stretching is one of the only habits that can not be over trained.
If you are serious about getting into the world of teen bodybuilding, I encourage you to start this habit early. Most text books teach stretching methods that include 20-30 seconds per stretch. Don't even waste your time if this is your idea of stretching. From real world, in the trenches, experience, I would suggest stretching at least the same amount of time that you lift. That means, for every 1 hour of weight training you perform, you must balance the effect of weight training with one hour of stretching. Therefore, if you weight train 4 hours in the week, you better be stretching for at least 4 hours in the week. If you are really lazy, start stretching for at least half the amount of time that you lift. After you see the benefits of increased strength, quicker recovery and less injuries I am sure you will have no problem bumping up your stretching sessions to the recommend 1:1 ratio.
Fail to stretch at least the same amount that you lift is almost a sure fire way of shortening a teen bodybuilding career or lifestyle. Remember, weight training shortens and tightens the connective tissue you train. Stretching counters the effect and ensures your muscles have room to grow!

8. Focus On Bodyweight Strength First
It amazes me at how many teen bodybuilders can barely do a set of 40 push ups, 20 chin ups and 30 dips. In my opinion, these are some standard upper body fitness tests that should be accomplished with ease before loading is introduced (it might take your 3 or 4 months to achieve this if you can't do them right now). I once heard a famous fitness coach say, “You have no freaking business using a load if you can't stabilize, control, and move efficiently using your own bodyweight.” I would have to fully agree.
What's the point of a sloppy 150 pound lat pulldown if you can't do 10 bodyweight pull ups? What's the point of a 185 pound bench press with microscopic range reps, if you can push up your body a couple dozen times? What's the point of a 500 pound leg press if you can do a set of one legged squats down to the floor? Believe me, after a few months of conditioning your body to body weight training, you will be blown away by how quickly your weights climb when you introduce loading.

9. Keep Your Workouts Under 1 Hour
Unless you are in a teen bodybuilding competition for the longest workout possible, it bewilders my mind what you could possibly be doing for longer than a hour! Unless you go to the gym for mirror workouts (that's when you spend more time looking in the mirror than actually lifting)I suggest getting some help with your workout program. If it takes longer than 20-30 minutes of even moderate intensity lifting to fully exhaust a muscle, I have to question your workout intensity. Shorter more intense workouts will always trump longer less intense workouts.
Your goal should be in fact to complete your workout faster and faster. This will force your muscles to condition and adapt to a greater work load. The more work you expose your muscles too, in a shorter amount of time will improve your muscle density. Your bodies ability to tolerate greater workloads.

10. Develop Full Range Of Motion
Initially, teen bodybuilding should involve building strong muscular attachments, tendons, ligaments and bones – text books refer this as anatomical adaptation. Look at building your muscles as the finishing touches on a solid house. You would not want to start framing the house until the foundation has been built. Strengthening your tendons, ligaments and bones would be considered building a strong foundation to build from.
What is the best way to begin a strong foundation for a house to stand on? Build from the bottom up or in our case, from the inside out. This means developing a full range of motion with each weight training exercise to ensure all the muscle fiber gets activated and all the supporting tissues are fully involved.
Think about it. Partial movements will only develop partial muscle. Full movements will develop full muscle. What would get you better results? Squatting 135 pounds with your butt to the floor or squatting 225 pounds for about ¼ of the way? That's correct, involving the entire range of motion with a lighter weight will involve more musculature, improve your mind-muscle connection quicker and strengthen all the supporting tissues more rapidly. Initially, as a teen bodybuilder, you should never sacrifice range for load.

Conclusion
If you are serious about doing teen bodybuilding safely and effectively than take all of the tips very seriously. Do not pick and choose the ones you wish to follow. They will all result in a long and fruitful bodybuilding lifestyle. To your teen bodybuilding success!

One of the most adventurous things left us is to got to bed.. For no one can lay a hand on our dreams...

2008-04-28T16:04:00.003+08:00

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Ovation please!! Finally the formalisation of M17 batch as an operational staff.. Couldn't really describe the feeling of anticipation reciting the speech for the batch... It's a mixed feeling.. But for the record, here is the exact speech brought out "live"...

"When you encounter a distinctively different batch, ehem, M17, there are several ways to enjoy it. First stop, we are no experts on this but four main approaches come to mind:
One, is to consider us as a reflection of an individual. The mere fact that our characteristics itself colours many people’s thinking about it. During ISP, we all were made known nothing more than as numbers – I was 11, Elton was 3, Hairi was 13 and Dayah was 6. It sounded strange to be referred as numbers but in the pursuit of our destiny, M17 was procreated and we are proud to say we are here to add what we can to life, and not to get what we can from it. Similarly, how after going through and getting to know us affects state of minds (you & me) and how does it fit nicely into the organisation with no prejudice or malice. It is often hard, to separate work styles from the person but we are all here to learn lessons and the world is our teacher. Experience can be said is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards.
Two, is to consider us as a reflection of times in which we were formed. How can one separate us from the many different senior batches? I mean, pretty sure each batch will says they are the best. Not that we claim we are anything special but it’s the fact that we should be moving our steps forward in time. We are humans and with it comes our fair share of foibles. However amid the despair and criticism, we are pretty surprised at how often we find a glimmer of hope and humour. In the beginning, it’s difficult to see stumbling rocks in perspective. In retrospect, they are more likely part of a larger scheme; either to make us stronger or taught us compassion.
Three, is the academic approach – our norm – to take us apart individually and study it’s technical mastery and intellectual riches. There are more to discover as an individual than sitting back and absorbing the whole of M17 as a batch. To say to focus on what was done as a group rather than who, do seems a little bit un-insightful over the long run. We will always be continually faced with a series of great opportunities cleverly disguised as insoluble problems. But as long as we don’t stop, no matter how slowly we do, great things can be achieved and learn.
Lastly, just you and your emotions. Do we speak to your life, your fears, your pleasures or challenges? In this approach, we kind of fade away, so does the history. All there is left is our presence and your own immediate responses to it. We realise now that it is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities. We will definitely give our best not because we need to impress anyone. We give our best because that’s the only way to enjoy our work. We are each a cause. Our thoughts attract and create circumstances.

Wise man once said, let your heart be your guide. Along the way you might discover further some interesting nit-knacks and learn something in the process too. If all of us do our part right, our sense of humour and rightness will be as engaging as our brain will be. Thank you all for showing us the Outward Bound ways and graciously extending your warmth hospitality during our training month, sharing your humble abode and revealing the grand essentials of happiness; something to do, something to love and something to hope for. Have a good day."

(Breathe out a sigh of relief) ...

Sadly I realized that my life is not going to take on the path that i would really like it to be. I've told her before that I do not want to have any expectations on us and just want to concentrate on building happy thoughts... Would that be too much to ask? I'm angry at myself and the fact that I can't do anything much about it except to pray to change my thoughts fast. Yesterday, everything was going fine until that last stretch home... Why? Why? Do you realised how much it hurt me? Do you ever thought about how I should feel at that point of time and how I should react during and afterwards? How do I pretend everything is back to norm? You know what frightened me the most? I almost thought I lost control of my anger and wanted to just shut you off... The agony inside me is still eating me.. For how long, I do not know... At the end of the day, I knew what made me sceptical throughout... I managed to catch the last episode of My name is Kim Sam Soon.. It was an ending though expected but not the kind of picture that I painted in my mind.. I know it's just a drama but I can't help feeling that lost and sadden.. After going through so much, the were both together but the guy's mum violently object to both of them getting married simply because of prejudice (familiar isn't it). Sam Soon, though disappointed, pretended happy just for her guy.. In her dream, her dad came to encourage her, telling her not to give up and no matter what, happiness lies with being the one that you love most... How do I go on about here? Only when you embrace me wholeheartedly I guess... For how long, I will just wait...

Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you sit down quietly, may alight upon you..

2008-04-20T21:48:00.003+08:00

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Oh call me naive if you want, but have you ever thought how true the quote " it's better to love and lost than to never loved at all" is?? Love brings about alot of heartache, hurt, annoyance, you name it!! And mind you, it doesn't and never will stop... But it is all there is to love?? Have we ever sit down and think about why we fall in love in the first place? Did we give ourselves enough chances?? The saint people will often say "why go through the painful process and trouble ourselves for nothing and it's something that can't even guarantee success" while the foolish, well, they just remain foolish. But that's the beautiful part isn't it?? Foolishness covers the very flaws that could jolly well frightened yourself. Will be lesser effort to stay foolish than to find yourself wakup one day and realised it's damn too late??

Best before or expiring... What if love has that? Ridiculous?!? Well, not really if you put it into perspective... I mean if love really has that tag, people will start to make best use of it and to appreciate the value of love right away presuming that they do not want to waste the lot. For whatever reason love comes about in the first place, maybe even if it seems so wrong yet right, or in whatever form, love is the best thing that happens in our life! It brings out the side that you probably would never have thought there is in the first place. I know there's good and bad side to it but really, is it in our nature to be bad in the first place?? We are born with brain and heart and last check, both of these majestic natural creation are more that enough to know what's wrong and right...

Sam Soon, the lady lead in the Korean show, is truly remarkable woman. Her story plight about losing her love tragically and the part when she started to believe in it again. The process of going through the obstacles that seems too much at first to handle but she took it with a pinch of salt without prejudice or malice. She knew life has it's own fair share or unfairness and was happy enough the bear the brute of the bitterness.. But a quote she gave struck the chord in my heart.. She had asked the male lead how much more does he wants her to understand when he professed that he is disappointed in her when she does not show enough. It began when he wanted to send off his just-broke-up ex as a last favour and Sam Soon refused at first knowing it wasn't easy for her to have the male fall in love with her. Technically speaking, it's fair enough that he's honest and shared it with her. However, reasoning here doesn't always work. Sam Soon has her own sets of fear - fear that she may just lose her man again, being worried to death whether will he be back with her and ultimately, fear of believing in love all over again..

All I know, what she felt and went through is similarly to mine.. It's like life has it's own way of reminding me of what I should have but could not get it no matter how hard I strive for.. Sad? Maybe but life has to go on.. People move with time stepping forward.. So why are there still setbacks and refusing to bulge our feet away from the past...

A tree as big around as you can reach starts with a small seed; a thousand-mile journey starts with one small steps...

2008-04-13T23:11:00.002+08:00

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Of course you are where your thoughts and actions during the last few years have brought you. Whatever you will be experiencing in your next ten or twenty years will be influenced by what you do today... Your friends, your family, your job, your bank balance, where you will be living - all these things are being shaped by what you choose to do.

But life itself is a buiding process. What you do today affects what will have tomorrow. Life doesn't happen in twenty four hour water tight compartments. Today's effort creates tomorrow's results. Whether you eliminate a nasty habit, whether you spend an hour with your family, whether you get some goals, whether you save or spend, whether you exercise your body, whether you stretch you mind - your decision makes the difference.

The ignorant never see it. Astute peple know it. What we do today IS important!

So you think you can get away with being casual and careless for awhile but, sooner or later, things catch up with you. Leave your bills unpaid, your work undone and your problems to everyone else and you may manage for a month or so. Then one day the walls fall in and you wonder why there is no fun in your work, no money in the bank and nobody is very friendly anymore. It is life reminding you that one day plus another has an accumulative effect. Wherever you are, it is the place to start. The effort you expand today does make a difference.

When you get sick and tired of being sick and tired, you'll change...

2008-03-16T21:52:00.005+08:00

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Oblivious seems to be the best word to describe me now... I could vividly recalled the first time I watched a Korean drama and hooked on the storyline ever since.. It started with Autumn in my Heart to Stairways to Heaven then My name is KSS and recently My Girl.. Funny thing with fate was in all these dramas, they have a thing about love rivalries and challenges that comes in a form of impossible yet love survives somehow... I've long thought that my stint with these sappy dramas are but just a passe of life.. Until recently, I do not understand why I am intrigued with their storyline until I realise it's not how much I wanted for the deserving, lovelorn lovers in the dramas to be together or that I know eventually the story will end with one of the party feeling devastated, hurt only because circumstances force them to accept and live with the lies and deceits that they cannot be with the one they love...

But the story of My girl undeniably pulled my heartstrings so much that I could relate to the pain and suffering of the male lead. Not that I'm going sentimental but the pain, disappointment, heartbroken and emotional confusion were played so real that I couldn't help but felt it through and through even though I could only catch a few of the episodes. The sufferings that both lovers went through, the faces of deceit that they try to convince themselves as real and the annoying circumstances that made fun of them, I could only marvel and at the same time felt small as whatever struggles I'm dealing with are impeccably insignificant. It certainly made me sit up straight and think if I were in the similar situation, would I abandon my family, wealth just so I can be with the one I love? Would I stop lying to myself that it doesn't hurts to lie further and not be honest about one's thoughts and feelings? Would I be able to take the pain alone just so I could protect my love one? What strikes me the most was the fact that the hard earned happiness the lovers deserve so much was easily slipped through at the hands of others no less, through manipulations and selfishness.

Sad but true that whatever situations we are in, we are in it because we have lessons to learn from it. We could start by having faith and pray to alter our thoughts on the circumstances otherwise what we basically demonstrate is a lack of understanding. Happiness doesn't require that you take something else up but that you drop something. Sure you have preferences about your circumstances but you don't have to see everything as right or wrong. You have preferences about who you spend time with, but you don't have to make everybody else wrong. Look for the beauty in those around us and you will find more within yourself. You see people not as they are but as you are... Your experience of the world is actually you experiencing yourself...

Forget the past for it's gone... Don't worry about the future for it's yet to come... Live the present for it's what makes it beautiful...

2008-03-09T16:20:00.004+08:00

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Of all the roads that I took, I guess this one is one of the most hardest, painful and bitter. Not that I mind any bit of regret at all. Never once will I looked back and said to myself, "This should not be the road that I should take the first place". Isn't human an irony themselves? Why can't they be simply contented with what they have and not ask for more than what they should? Why should I strive so hard for happiness when it never fails to slip through my hands everytime? I'm contented enough to swallow and eat any bitterness myself just so others have their hard earned share of happiness. Is this not enough to convince you? I'm not him and never will I be or want to be.. He has unceremoniously succeeded in planting the seed of guilt that digs dwell past trust and happiness, the very thing I had hope you will wake up and saw that coming. Haven't you seen enough everytime how much I just want to shut off whenever any hint of unhappiness sets in? Do communication have to be about expectations and how you feel everytime? They are but just passe of life aren't they? Is it too much to ask to forget and just thought of happiness? My heart died at your hands and words - at least I'm contented. I've shared before I never let you go and I will not. It's just I do it differently than others. I'm not hoping you to understand every bit of me - I just want you to be you. Don't asked me whether in the future will I have a change of heart or that will I get bored. Don't asked me whether do I still love you everytime when you thought I drift away. I'm heartbroken, angry, disappointed, frustrated, sad, confused all over - how you expect me to answer and behave normally? You painstakenly talked about the trust that you destroyed in him but how about mine? Quarrels and arguements are ineveitable but do we have to dwell on it? My thoughts are poison and my feelings akin assasination. Would I want my love one to bear through it? How I could I bear to do so? How could I??

Breakup? Time Off? How I wish these words never manage to meet the daylight in the first place... It is nothing but full of negativities. One thing for sure in us, only you have the courage to do that. The very thing that I fear... I can't blame you nor can I. You have your needs which I may have neglected and that's probably why you can't see and share the dreams that I have and probably why you kept having doubts even when there's not a need to. Love cures, love hurts, love creates life, love kills. A simple 4 letters word can bring either happiness or agony and both at the same time. My mind getting cynical about love. If you had really love me, you would have strive for happiness with me. If you had really love me, you would not throw your trantrums at me. If you had really love me, you would not push me aside. If you had really love me, you would know that many facets in life we just can't control. If you had really love me, you wouldn't have reminded me of the handicapped that I am. Do you really need to know my expectation? Would you be able to achieve it? What if you can't, does it mean I can't have you or that you have to leave me?

Sorry really seems the hardest word and I'm not ashamed to say the least I'm not perfect and I'm sorry about that. If you can't live with the whole of me - the good and bad- then take your mum's advise (cue unwillingly). Isn't that what you also suggest - for the experimental. I do not really know whether to laughed it off in tears or be angry about it but then I realise, it's your ground to suggest that in the face of uncertainties. I've no one to confide since the begining of time and it makes no different really. As much as I yearn for it, it's just not mean to be. You are you and you are free to do so. Simply end here... I love you always...

Exercise your imagination as you do your body... the more you develop it, the easier it will be to solve problems and remember facts...

2008-01-27T15:49:00.000+08:00

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Of course we must cherish our imagination; our ability to dream; for the highest achievers since history began, have been the dreamers who, combined their perspiration and their aspiration to make their own unique contribution. There's a great saying by James Allen, "the greatest archievement was at first and for a time a dream... the oaksleeps in the acorn; the bird waits in the egg; and in the highest vision of the soul a waking angel stirs. Dreams are the seedlings of realities..."

Best examples?? Leonardo Da Vinci, aged twelve and illegitimate, vowed, "I shall become one of the greatest artists the world has ever known and one day I shall live with kings and walk with princes."

While a young boy, Napoleon spent long hours conquering Europe in his mind, dreaming of how he would lead and manage his troops. The rest is history.

The Wright brothers turned their dreams into aeroplanes. Henry Ford turned his dream of an affordable car for everybody into assembly line manufacturing.

Even as a child, Neil Armstrong dreamed of making his mark in the field of aviation. In July 1969, he became the first man to walk on the moon.

Stand by your dreams. Everything starts as a dream. As the song says, "If you never have a dream, you'll never have a dream come true." I have a dream and it's beautiful, but would you share it with me? Let's stop all the hustling and pits of negativities and focus on happiness shall we??

"Love cures two people... The person who gives it and the person who receives it..."

2007-12-27T16:10:00.000+08:00

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Others have asked me what does it means to love thy lover... To me, I believe in not judging, not putting labels on the one and expect nothing out of them... This turns out to be a very practical strategy, at least for me, which can save us a lot of frustration and disappointment. Like most spiritual principles, it is also a excellent psychological advice.

But how do we go about it? Well, we tend to say, "If I understood why he is so arrogant/ stubborn/ quiet, then perhaps I could love the guy." If we make the choice to love someone, we begin to understand them. Forgiveness and love are one and the same. That's why we find it easier to love babies - because we preceive them as innocent/ cute...

So whenever we choose to see love in a situation, we are making progress - mainly because we can't love and resent people at the same time!!

He who can suppress a moment's anger may prevent a day of sorrow...

2007-12-19T14:04:00.000+08:00

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Of all the seven deadly sins, anger has been written about since writing began. (the other 6 are pride, greed, gluttony, lust, sloth & envy) What purpose does it serve? Well, it certainly does no one any good if it is not resolved. Often we become more angry at ourselves for blowing up more than we were at the person at whom we blew up. Sometimes the guilt we carry after showing anger is more troublesome than the thing or person we were angry with. But what happens when we suppress it?

By harbouring anger, we do nothing but makes ourselves less healthy - mentally, physically and spiritually. That's why psychologists tell us that we have to find a way to get rid of our excess energy when we are angry. The dilemma is : How do we blow off this energy without regretting it? Physical exercise can help. Getting ourselves away from the trouble spot will give us a chance to count 10, 20, 30 or 40, if we need to, to get a grip on ourselves before we turn a few seconds of anger into a lifetime of regret.

Sagely speaking, the other antidote is to increase our tolerance. How often do we get riled up over something that, in the long run, just didn't matter? How often do we go ballistic over something as ridiculous as our own ego being damaged? In order to get more out of life, we keep a lid on it. The time we save will be our own!

...It's funny after all this time, moments you are angry, you wished something bad happen to the other party. And when it really happens, you don't really know how to comprehend the situation. RWPFS (if you remember, it was the bane of my life) was officially sold secretly and cease to exist. At one point of time, I wished I could clapped my hands in glee and right smack at your face, I really want to say, " You deserve it!! For all the bad things you have done to people who are innocent, this is just a small fraction of what's to come..." On the other hand, it was inhumanely shattered, a heart wrenching finale and as much as I hate to say this, but there was afterall hardwork involved, relentless sweat and huge amount of time invested in what you believe, a dream come through. Sympathy?? I don't know whether you deserve it but take it as a consolation if you want...

Up till now, I wished my love ones would know my every good intention. It's tiring and taxing for both of us. I seriously have thought through alot before I even opened my mouth to suggest. If you really think my time is simply not enough for you, I rather sacrifice my interest. Just say the word and I type out the letter for you. It hurts me alot and have left me a scar knowing that you would always refer to my handicap everytime you feel insecure. Haven't I done enough? Or maybe I'm just not your expectation? Everytime I shared my innermost thoughts, I just can't seem to seek your understanding why I chose that way. Is it not me showing you moments of caring? Is it too difficult being with me? Sigh, I've grown to accept that it is my life that I have to fight hard for what I want and sadly, in the process, I can't be me. I've lost a little of me everytime I do that. But do people appreciate that? Do people see that it's eating me out and does anyone care? I'm not one to tell people what I've done for the greater good of people or that I'm asking people to show kindness to me for once. For the sake of what I think it's good for you or that I think you deserve something good, I've changed to suit others. Why?? Huh! it's ridiculous to even think of such question. If it's not for you, who and what elses reasons there can be? Sometimes, I don't even know myself, my identity...

Love is much like a wild rose, beautiful and calm, but willing to draw blood in its defense...

2007-12-02T21:46:00.000+08:00

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Disclaimer: In this entry, I will be at my most cynical and prerogatives views. Those that oppose violently to straightforward, honest feelings and opinions are STRONGLY advise not to proceed with reading. This entry will IN NO WAY be held liable for whatever problems that may arise in legal suit, be it against my views or my thoughts or it doesn't goes down well with you!

Over and over the past few weeks have been a tremulous ride for me. Seriously, who determined whose right and whose wrong? You?? Me?? Bull!! I do not dictate whosoever views that I don't agree with as wrong. I may not seemed to like it but in no way will I ever put across it as "it's not the right thing to do!" Heck! I'm entitled to my own and I'm damned sure I spoke with my own conviction and not try to put down your ideas or that "I'm trying to put upon you that my views are the best!" Yes, I'm stubborn and I may came across as arrogant but hey people, think for a second on that pea-brain, have you been open to MY views instead? I've heard thousands and many times of your views AND from the others who apparently are factory-made as well. You may have the experiences and seniority but you are not walking the talk. "Out-of-comfort zone"! Yah rite, my foot!! Just because my views are different and not conservative, it does not meant in any way that it is not deemed safe and you have the cheek to disclose that I'm not in line with the majority. That's not being fair to me and poor me I have to swallow my pride and pretend not to be me! Cursed! Can't we have normal people who truly values each other?? Can't you just judge me by the events that unfold in front of me, live, rather than YOUR events that happen to you and NOT me? Yes I welcome your advises and views but you don't need to pin it on me as "it must be this way or else..." And please, do a check on your mirror before you try to correct others. Do not dropped judgement without finding out WHAT I have done beforehand to salvage or make any negative situations better. Remember assuming is actually making an ASS out of U and ME!!

Besides the hideous misgivings I have to endure, the next unexpected thing come in a form of love. Not that I mind but the more I keep quiet, the more vicious people tongue can be that I wished to God that he could just cut off the damned flicking dirty anatomy that is missused by these incorrigible people. Yes, you live in guilt for the fact that you are good. But for how long?? Do you have any idea how sharp and poisonous your guilt was and what it had done to me?? I'm fighting the monster that I tried hard before to suppress and it ate my heart inside out that many point of time, I feel like I'm without soul. Telling me "no regrets that you are with me" does not make it easier for me or you, for it just pinned you further down. With all due respect, why do the guy have to put across to you in a way that people and you will sympathize him? Does it help him or you to move on better and more effectively?? Precisely, what it did to you was to make you even more guilty thinking you are even in the wrong and that you shouldn't have treated him that way in the first place. Then what about how you treat me when you were feeling that way?? How do you think I should feel or do?? Pretend that I'm still the understanding and patience love one? I've gone crazy in my mind and I'm trying very hard to stay in sane. It's not helping that advises were given by whom I thought they were friends - friends who supported us unbiase-ly. Do their religion dictate that they should imposed their views and that it's not worth my religion to sacrifice for? As far as my modern thinking in me, I believe that your religion and mine are somewhat similiar cause for anyone out of our norm, they would HAVE to sacrifice not the other way round in love matters. What kind of question is that whether I can give up my religion to be with my love one? That is as good as shooting me down dead on without me having any protection. It's an idiot answer for those who care about their identity and for sure I will be the losing end. I want to scream, I want to shout for help and tell someone just someone how much my heart bleed, how much it ache. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't concentrate and that very moment I just thought I have lost myself. I know you are having your difficulties and that's exactly why I have to do what I did. I can't jeopardise you further that I already have. To put it bluntly, consider it my fault and I know no amount of forgiveness is going to make up for what you went through. You are afraid of the future but who doesn't? Can't we just have peace for ourselves and concentrate on building a happier future? Is it too much to ask?? Do I have to succumb to fate?? Is loving someone a crime??

Still, it's no brainer for me for I always always have to work hard to get what I want. And that itself doesn't constitute me getting what I want in the first place. I was born with hard lines across my palms and I don't have ready luck to brag for. That's why my perspective of life is contrary. All I know it's time for me to push on my limits further... I hope I have the strength to see to it...

I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas... I'm frightened of the old ones...

2007-11-18T11:40:00.000+08:00

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Obviously it's the case of "... either I will find a way or I will make one...". These days it seems to be getting harder and harder to wade through all the rules and regulations we come up against with. It seems as though half the people we meet are in the business of looking after some arm of some regulatory body. They spend their days trying to keep us from doing things instead of helping us get things done. This is not a new concept, and we need to be aware that there is always a way to get where we want to go if we just start by realizing that we can do it...

Be it at first glance, many things seem to be difficult. If it isn't the size of the task, it's confusing details or uncooperative helpers. Sometimes we will have to take our own advice and make our way...

So it is at this precise moment that we need to remember there is always a way when we have the will to proceed. Problems come when our will gets extinguished by critics and other narrow minded negative thinkers. The roadblocks can stay there, and we can be sure that they will. All we have to do is let them sit there mired in their own mud and travel around them. Our strength will come from our conviction to our idea, and so will the solutions..

"... you know, everything I am... my unique spirit and personality... everything that makes me.. is dependent on the proper functioning of this complex, fragile and miraculous chunk of meat that is my body..."

Enjoy life... There's plenty of time to be dead...

2007-10-27T00:22:00.000+08:00

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Overcomplicating our lives are the tendency that we have it seems... We forget what's important and what's not... That's trouble for many of us; we underestimate the power of simplicity... We tend to mistake movement for achievement... We tend to focus on activities instead of results... and as the pace of life's continue to race along in the outside world, we forget that we have the power to control our lives regardless of what's going on outside...

Bet my last nickel I had the worst month of my life this year.. I can't believe that I took 3 times just to complete the safety test.. On top of that, it rubbed on to my wound that I'll be taking the 3rd time for my theory.. I got so frust up over my initial assessment.. The result was not what I had expected... Exactly who and what defines one's right and wrong, well, right or wrong... I guess success is a simply matter of luck... Just ask any failure!!

Shortly, I decided that it advisable not to give too much heed to what people say when I am trying to accomplish something of consequence... Invariably, they proclaim it can't be done.. I deem that the very best time to make the effort!

Whatever you can do, or dream you can... begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it..

2007-09-29T16:54:00.000+08:00

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One person said it this way, "Here's how to get whatever you want - do whatever it takes!"... We have to make the first move. As long as we stand around on the edge of things, unprepared to jump in, the universe seems to take the attitude, "Well, you don't seem very serious about this. Once you get committed, then you'll get some help."

The moment we declare, "I'll do this thing, no matter what!" we somehow tap into that "genius, power and magic".

Be it you or me, everyone who achieves in life, makes decision to do so. Instead of saying "I WILL do it", those who proclaimed, "I'll give my best shot" or "I'll have a go" or "I'll try" will likely to fail. "Nothing can resist the human will that will stake even its existence on the extent of it's purpose"...

It's best we also realise that whenever we make a stand on something, people will test us out. They each secretly hoping that you will have the strength to stand by your commitment. In addition, an interesting thing happens when we commit ourselves. Often, the commitment is enough. In other words, if you are prepared to do anything to achieve your goal, generally you won't have to. But if you are only half serious, you may well be tested to the limit!

So until one is commited

there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back,

always ineffectiveness.

Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation)

there is one elementary truth,

the ignorance of which kills countless ideas

and splendid plans:

that the moment one definitely commits oneself,

the Providence moves too.

All sorts of things occur to help one

that would otherwise never have occurred.

A whole stream of events issues from the decision,

raising in one's favour all manner

of unforeseen incidents and meetings

and material assitance,

which no man could have dreamt

would have come his way...

Ps: so why is it that I can get through this last hurdle yet? I have put much time and effort in studying and is it too much to ask for luck to be on my side...

Desire of the Untamed Land...

2007-09-16T23:06:00.000+08:00

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Overflowing desire had his hands deftly undressed her without her even noticing it. He waited a moment, then kissed her once more, his hands exploring the same way his mouth explored her. She melted in his arms, responding to his kisses with all the pent-up passion she had been feeling since she first met him. Wanting to do something for him, she turned over and felt warmth and her desire for him. His manhood brushed against her and she urgently moved her hands as she tried to reach him.
He smiled, but said nothing as he moved out of her reach, tantalizing her, and allowed his mouth to settle for a moment to suckle each fullness. His fingers now slid down between her valley and down each leg, his thumbs trailing lightly between her thighs, pausing for the briefest seconds as she moaned with his touch. The heel of his hand stopped now on her mound and pressing firmly, rotated in small, slow circles as her own body responded, answering his urgent need for her..

But all she wanted was to feel his touch, to know him, as the waves of pleasure washed over her like the waves of the sea. Never stopping the pressure, his other fingers touched her other lips, trailing along from back to front, slowly inside just a little, slowly outside and around. She could feel her wetness as he increased his pressure on the center of her core and the water of love continued to overwhelm her. She collapsed, feeling the warm glow spread over her and wanting to please him even more.
He smiled and evaded her grasp again as he continued to bent his head and kissed her essence, his tongue dancing circles the way his fingers had done, moments ago. She whimpered and his only response was his sinuous tongue moving gently and firmly, pushing yet another wave as his fingers pressed inside of her and she cried out...

She felt her body burned with his desire. On all fours now, he gently spread her so that his manhood was poised at her forbidden temple. Her hips responded by straining against to meet him. He cupped her buttocks as, holding her, he gently slid in, up and down, filling her. She arched herself towards him, wanting to give him all the pleasure that he had given her. They were both washed overboard together as ecstasy shook them, draining all their energy away. He collapsed beside her and held her long enough as the moment of intense pleasure faded away to the warmth of their bodies...

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance...

2007-09-15T00:11:00.000+08:00

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Outweigh the expense of ignorance against the cost of education... which one would you say? Definitely ignorance!! When we try to find ways to chop budgets in teaching and training, we are cutting off our own means of survival. It's like drilling a hole in the bottom of a leaking boat...

But though patching the hole helps, sometimes we have to do some major repairs. We know it's time for those repairs when we see ourselves slipping behind others. Business of course, is another measurement, however, we must be careful not to use it as the only measure. Enlightenment is a sure way to test for the quality of our education systems. In a nutshell, when we invest in education, we will not only earn interest, but the principal will grow....

Since the start of the week, we went through the lifesaving syllabus and it was worth the while. The endless hours of gagging in the water, trying to grasp the skills as best as possible just so we can make the outdoor education a much safer and enjoyable place. The test went unexpectedly well considering we are quite the lonesome pair taking it. Can't say much about the aches :)...

Leadership is more than a set of rules and learned skills - it's an art...

2007-09-09T14:09:00.000+08:00

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Observation week!! Definitely a heart stirring affair for me watching and grasping all the necessary skills and experiences that constitutes leadership styles. I realised that identifying your own leadership style makes lets you maximise its strength and compensate for any weakness. Whatever your style, it must be authentic. If the people following you know that "what they see is what they get", they will feel more comfortable with, and trusting of you as a leader...

"But what kind of style would you adopt", you asked? Many styles can work... There are just as many as there are leaders - which is one reason the subject of leadership can be so complex. Some leaders communicate a decision in one sentence, while others take a paragraph. Some smile, some don't. Some seem to be in constant motion, while others move more deliberate. Whatever it is, make use of your style - the more you aware you are of your natural leadership style, the better you'll be able to make use of its advantages, turn possible disadvantages into strengths and head off any misinterpretations...

Style must be you... Never try to change your personality to fit someone else's image of what a leader should be. And while giving all due credit to the role models that helped shape your leadership skills, be aware that you are not them. The temptation to fake a leadership style is strongest for new leaders, whose self-confidence is still building. Do your best and you will find the support. No one expects you to be a grizzled veteran!!

Remember, insensitive, bullying behaviour, no matter what the circumstances, is never an appropriate style. It masks a lack of self-confidence that will lead to serious mistakes in judgement...

PS it's nice to hear from some familiar voices... Though our times are short-lived, I hope that you guys will move on soon to find happiness and expand your wings...

The seeds of knowledge may be planted in solitude, but must be cultivated in public...

2007-08-26T14:35:00.000+08:00

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Oddly, in order for us to become more knowledgeable, we need to cultivate the things that we learn. By keeping our ideas to ourselves, we are safe from criticism, but our ideas may not grow much. Even Einstein said he could see further by standing on the shoulders of others.

Be known that we are more vulnerable when we expose our ideas to the public, but imagine how far back in the dark ages we'd be if medical practitioners didn't exchange ideas or if industrialists kept manufacturing advances to themselves. Where would we be without freedom of speech cultivated in public and helped along by ideas from a variety of sources?? Where would our personal freedoms be if we weren't able to plant our seeds in solitude and cultivate them in public? We would be in big trouble for sure...

So to make headway, we must be willing to try out our ideas wherever we can. By taking a little risk, we can make amazing strides. Without risking, we can't expect any cultivating or any growth to take place. Sure, sometimes that lack of fire makes other thinks we aren't convinced about our idea or that the idea has flaws. Practice helps us work out the flaws and develop something we're proud of, something we can tell others about with all the enthusiasm in the world. By practicing what we know, sharpening the axe once in a while, we'll be able to light the way on our journey through life!

Gift of Fire...

2007-08-26T13:41:00.000+08:00

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Often, his need for her was as irresistible as the tide. She could feel herself pulsing with her own feminine desire. "I want you," he rasped. "I want you so damm much. I have to have you. You belong to me." She was catching fire under his torch. His urgency was now hers. She was swarmed with a cascade of feelings that ran gamut from fearful excitement to an aching desire for surrender. "Yes," she cried out softly as his palm closed over her dampening female flesh. She arched against his posessive touch and clutched at his shoulders. "Yes, please."

He muttered a hoarse response, the words unintelligible as he shoved a knee between her legs and cradled himself in the warm space there. He bent his head to kiss the satin skin of her thigh, teeth grazing her with exquisite care. Deliberately, he lifted himself slightly away from her. His eyes locked with hers, telling her silently of his need as his hand slid warmly down the length of her, caressing her fullness and the curve of her stomach. His fingers were trembling with sensual tension when they touched the inside of her thigh.

"Touch me again," he begged thickly. "Please." Tentatively she obeyed, trailing her fingers from his chest and down toward the fine thicket that framed his manhood. She held her breath for an instant as she touched him intimately and he groaned. He bent his head and found her fullness with his tongue. She sighed and began to relax. Her legs parted willingly this time for his gentle proding. "Harder," he coaxed when she began to tease him with her fingertips. He pushed himself more heavily into her hand, dampening her palm with evidence of his arousal. She touched him more firmly wondering at the steel in him. "That's it," he breathed.

His strong , blunt fingers circled the small pouting opening between her legs until it began to flower. "You feel so good, so perfect," he muttered again. She moved restlessly, opening herself further to his touch. He kissed her deeply as he slid one finger a short distance inside her damp channel. The erotic movement of his tongue echoed the motion of his stroking finger. The combination was wildly, unbearingly thrilling. He needed no further urging. He was hard and ready.

Before she knew it, he came to her, his lips raining fire on her fullness, his muscled hips pushing apart her soft thighs until his heavy manhood was poised against her body. He reached down to part her softness with long, sensitive fingers that trembled and then he drove himself into her, sheathing himself to the hilt with a shuddering groan. The impact of his sensual invasion sent a compulsive tremor through her. She felt tight and stretched. All the small muscles in her lower body felt strained to the limit. She decided she was still new or either that he was simply big for her. He started to move within her, establishing a throbbing rhythm that radiated out to every nerve ending in her body.

She felt a strange tingling, clenching sensation begin deep within her as he withdrew himself almost completely and then surged back into her. She could feel the whole, heavy length of him as he opened her small passage and occupied the soft feminine territory. She clung to him and felt herself tightening around him, seeking something she couldn't identify. "That's it honey," he grated. "That's the way. Give yourself to meLet me have everything. You are going to squeeze me dry. Let me get all the way inside. All the way, I don't want you to think of anything except how good you feel..."

Her shivering, violent climax took her by surprise. She had not known what to expect but when it washed over her, she knew exactly what it was. She seized it eagerly with all her might and gave herself up to it and the man who had inspired it. "Oh yes. honey." He shuddered heavily once more and then froze for an instant, eyes closed, face taut as he pumped out his own release...

Every "Disaster" in your life is not so much a disaster, as a situation waiting for you to change your mind about it...

2007-08-22T23:35:00.000+08:00

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"Oh no!" Sounds familiar?!? Officially, it's natural to groan when things go wrong and when things does not goes your way, but remember, It's not WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU that matters most... It's how YOU THINK ABOUT what happens to you...

Better scenario example would be, say you work in a restaurant that you have tirelessly spent every effort and energy in you to deliver the best. Then one day, you get the golden handshake (or kicked out) and the unfeeling, not-worthy, incapable bosses tells you, "Sorry! We won't be needing your service anymore and you need to leave the premises immediately!"

You are furious! (Heck you have every right to be!) You tell yourself: "This is terrible! This is disaster!" While you remain stressed, things will get worse! People will trip over you, or spilled coffee on your lap and even lose your valuables. When you fight life, life always wins!

Then finally you cool down. You tell yourself: "There's nothing I can do about it. I'll make the most of it."

Suddenly, everything changes! From nowhere an old friend appears, or you make a new friend, or you stumble on a fresh opportunity - and life begins to support you. Once we change our thoughts about "a bad situation", we can take advantage of it. Life's great opportunities mostly arrive disguised as misfortune and disaster. Karma too have a weird sense in getting back at you for what you did to others! (yeah I'm gloating! so what?!?)

PS A salute to my new found pals. Though time with you guys are short, I wished you the best in your endeavours and abundance of good health...

Gift of Gold...

2007-08-19T07:14:00.000+08:00

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Onwards, he shoved the clothes down her hips, letting it fall into a pool at her feet. His gaze roved over her as she stood nude before him. His hands followed the trail of his gaze, scorching her skin as he explored the valley between her chest and curve of her waist. Then his fingers went lower, tangling lightly in the dim lights at the juncture of her thighs. The heat inside him assailed her, summoning forth a torrent of damp fire between her legs. When his fingertips brushed through the liquid fire, she thought she would collapse. All the strength seemed to be gone from her limbs. He put her down in the center of the small bed and stripped himself off with a ruthless energy while he stepped out of his jeans. She looked at him, her eyes full of feminine wonder. The shadows in the room concealed the details of his arousal but gave hints to his shoulders and chest.

Before she could think further, she felt his hands on the insides of her thighs, prying apart her legs. His fingertips found the tiny bud of desire sheltered below her waist. When he stroked her gently, she gasped and lifted herself against his hands. He was vibrating with tension as he fought himself unmoving within her and at the same time keep her pinned carefully beneath him. The muscles of his back and thighs were as contoured steel. His forehead was damp.

She sucked in her breath under his impact. She was unprepared for the size of him and the suddenness which he had penetrated her. She breathed deeply, rallying her scattered senses. There was no denying that she had wanted this lovemaking. His body still taut as he dropped more reassuring kisses across her fullness and into the hollow of her shoulders. Slowly with exquisite care, he measured the length of her feminine sheath, filling her to the hilt and withdrawing slightly. He drew a savage breath and removed his hands from between their bodies. He gripped her with sudden fierceness, driving himself into her with increasing intimacy. She tightened herself, instinctively wrapped her legs around his hard hips and her lower body strained to hold him to her, seeking more of the delightful sensation. With one last agonized groan, he surged deeply into her and went rigid, his muffled shout of satisfaction filled the room...

Letting Go...

2007-08-13T22:35:00.000+08:00

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Once upon a time, two monks on a pilgrimage came to the ford of a river. There they saw a girl dressed in all her finery, obviously not knowing what to do since the river was high and she did not want to spoil her clothes. Without more ado, one of the monks took her on his back, carried her across and put her down on dry ground on the other side. Then the monks continued on their way...

But the other monk after an hour started complaining, "Surely it is not right to touch a woman; it is against the commandments to have close contact with women. How could you go against the rules of monks?" The monk who had carried the girl walked along silently, but finally he remarked, "I set her down by the river an hour ago, why are you still carrying her?"...

Sometimes, wisdom just seems to elate us. The things that we should not harbour - Anger, Pride, Lust, Gluttony, Envy, Sloth, Greed - just have the innate sense to stick with us, bite back and be reminded of it every single moment. Sure it's wrong when we indulge in them, but by not letting go and guilt over it, it might just manifest into something much bigger - much much worse.

Heart to heart...

2007-08-09T22:19:00.000+08:00

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Overwhelmed by the depth of the feelings he evoked, she closed her eyes. His mouth plundered hers, punishing her softness with every bit over the past weeks. She knew it's provocation has been her doing. This kiss, bearing an untethered passion, was the staking of his claim on her. Tearing his lips from hers, he swept her off her feet and before she could cry out to even speak of the slightest fear, he was half atop of her. His hands pinioned hers on either side of her head; his mouth seizing hers once more. She took it with an odd welcome. She would be startled at herself had she been aware of what she was doing. But minute by minute she was more swept up in his passion until her own mirrored it fully...

Bewildered, everything in her life had been slow and disciplined, well planned and properly pace. Yet she felt alive now and decidedly reckless. She suddenly ached to know all it was that she's missed for so long. He released her hands then to let his own roam her body; shaping his fingers to her shoulders, her waist, her hips and thighs, branding each spot his. She found herself straining upward, craving more. When he brought his hands up to cover her suppleness, she gasped against his lips, not in fear but ecstacy...

She felt him raise himself, felt his gaze on her, felt him lower his head on her. Even his roughness was a sweet pain, diverting her mind from the growing ache deep in her belly. It was only the begining. His fingers touched her skin, their manly roughness inching upward from her waist over the smoothest of flesh. His lips were by her ear; she thought she heard him rasp her name before he gritted his teeth together. Then his hand settled over her fullness, massaging it in circles that continued to spiral through her body in non-ending coils...

Great work come through perseverance...

2007-08-09T20:19:00.000+08:00

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Organizational leadership - now that is a pretty big word to digest isn't it?? Imagine us trying to get in all the big organization's know-how, it's area of expertise, it's head; all these within 2 days!! And the best part - our ever-youthful Yuslina (who unfortunately encountered some "feeleey" moment) - believes we can pull it through by hook or by crook by means of test paper (groan!) For a crash course, PA (People's Association) is our parent company who diversifies in many area; one being handling the people's well-being affair. You might heard of CDC (Community Development Council), CDD (Community Development Division), CCC (Citizens Consultive Committee), CCMC (Community Center Management Committee), NC (Neighbourhood Committee) and RC (Resident's Committee) etc. And then there's the NYC (National Youth Center), NACLI (National Community Leadership Institute), SDS (Social Development Service) not forgetting OBS (Outward Bound Singapore). You probably wonder what are the difference or who are who (or maybe you go huh?!?). But lets not go into it shall we, less making our head spinning around heh...

But on a serious note, at its best, politics is how we balance competing interest in a democracy country like us - the little red dot. For example to many outdoors people, environmental issues are a special focus. Whether you get involved or not - successful politics is about successful leadership.

Similarly, they have keep their flame of passion bright; vision, momentum and values. Their vision for it's work has been sharp, inspiring and relevant. They have also maintain the momentum of its policies and programmes over the years and define and uphold their values. I guessed I've learnt the most was probably at the Grassroots Heritage. The amount of past and present knowledge was intriguing and the enthusiasm of the guide was clearly shown - alittle too clearly OTT though :).

Moments to moments...

2007-08-08T00:00:00.000+08:00

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...Over and over, she felt parts of her coming alive that she hadn't known existed. Her skin seemed to catch the fire of his, her every pore open and ultra-sensitive to the impassioned heat of his body. She felt his hands on her back, covering every inch of her velvet skin, sending a burst of awareness to her loins with the downward tracing of her spine...

She knew what was coming, and she ached for it though it frightened her. For him, protectiveness, emotional need, physical desire - he felt all these plus a strange fear of his own thought of all he wanted to do with and for her. He was awed by the thought of what he was about to do to her even then.

But he loved her more than he'd ever loved another living thing, and he knew that without her his life would be as meaningless as the last few years had increasingly been. When she responded with rising desire, he knew she'd set herself in his care. She felt warm and sensuous, more than ready when his lips followed the trail of his hands to heighten the electricity to sizzling proportion... "I love you," he whispered, then covered her lips as, with uncompromising purpose, he thrust forward. She reeled in delight, stunned by the pleasure she felt, both the fire within and the beauty without..

Straining herself higher, she arched against him in search of the final wonder of which her body was aware before she was herself. It came to a blinding explosion that seemed to shake her body endlessly, its aftershock nearly indistinguishable from his own shuddering release. Only after what seemed an eternity of mindless bliss, he collapsed on top of her, their body mutually spent, savouring the ecstasy they'd shared. Basking in his love, she gave a sigh of pleasure knowing that she'd had been able to please him...

Being frightened is an experience you can't buy...

2007-08-07T22:50:00.000+08:00

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Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt - a famous quote by William Shakespeare - it echoes the high possibilities of facing the "excitement" (without the breath!) in our everyday events. Think about it - You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing, which you think you cannot do. If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.

Besides, accuse me of sadistic, but I find the situation being caught in-between the heart and the mind rather enticing (or alluring!). You know deep within you wanted to take up the challenge but your mind access the dangers and risks involve and you doubt about coming out well and fine after attempting the challenges. Or vice versa, your mind is set to do it after analysing the safety preceedings that have well taken care of but your heart fails you at the last moment due to fear.

Stepping out of your comfort zone is the first thing you have to set your mind to when dwelling in the outdoors. Be brave enough to live creatively and leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you will discover will be wonderful. What you will discover will be yourself... cheers

I love you...

2007-08-05T22:44:00.000+08:00

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"Oh the little things i should have said and done

I just never took the time

You were always on my mind... "

Thinking back, what is the theme of almost every song and novel, and every movie ever made? LOVE! lost love, found love, puppy love, risky love, scorned love...

Nearly everything we do is an attempt to get more love. Every person you'll ever meet is aching for love and acceptance - and some of us are doing crazy things to get it. We are so busy trying to find love that we sometimes forget to tell the people we care about how we feel...

Too often we wait for a tragedy before we tell people what they always wanted to hear. Sometimes the tragedy means it's too late to tell them..

Believe me gege when I said "I love you".. I do not mean for fun and neither it's a routine for me to say it.. Please accept this poem dearest dearie...

Eternity
I smile whenever I recall
The special moments we have had;
Walking always hand in hand
Through the good times and the bad.

Sometimes, I think it is a dream --
The love you give me could not be;
But then when you are in my arms
There's no mistake in its purity.

Whether I'm with you or far away,
My thoughts are always drawn to you
Like a compass needle pointing North
To a love much more than true.

Of all the people on this Earth --
How lucky can a person be;
To have found the likes of you, my love,
With whom to share eternity!

Straight from my heart, I hope you do know how i feel towards you.. I may be a klutz in the emo department but I'm sincere all around...